for Woman's World: Apostasy12/19/2008 c15 
2NRsaint
Dear Svonnah,
I decided to finally come and see what all the fuss was about. Having fallen in love with this story, I feel you should know that it has inspired me to stop writing horror novels and move into the much more appreciated catagory of romance novels. Thanks for the life-turn-about!
-Stephen King
HHAHAHAHAH stephen king probably "tried" to turn his life around- wrote a love story, then in self hatred probably counteracted that with the murder of dozens of protagonists. i think you just killed some main characters.
2NRsaintDear Svonnah,
I decided to finally come and see what all the fuss was about. Having fallen in love with this story, I feel you should know that it has inspired me to stop writing horror novels and move into the much more appreciated catagory of romance novels. Thanks for the life-turn-about!
-Stephen King
HHAHAHAHAH stephen king probably "tried" to turn his life around- wrote a love story, then in self hatred probably counteracted that with the murder of dozens of protagonists. i think you just killed some main characters.
12/19/2008 c14 NRsaint
Dear Savannah
Having heard of your famous stories from my good friends JK Rowling and KA Applegate, both of whom said your written romance rivaled my own, I decided to check out WW and Apostasy, and indeed I now join them in their opinions. This story is so much better than any sappy, unrealistic romance novel I have ever written. I may be a household name, but you are a chatroom name. I worship the keyboard you type on.
-Your fan Nora Roberts
the next nora roberts? yeah definitly.
Dear Savannah
Having heard of your famous stories from my good friends JK Rowling and KA Applegate, both of whom said your written romance rivaled my own, I decided to check out WW and Apostasy, and indeed I now join them in their opinions. This story is so much better than any sappy, unrealistic romance novel I have ever written. I may be a household name, but you are a chatroom name. I worship the keyboard you type on.
-Your fan Nora Roberts
the next nora roberts? yeah definitly.
12/19/2008 c12 NRsaint
Dear Savannah,
I have been reading this series ever since the first chapter of WW, and wanted to let you know that it has a far superior and original plotline, with more realistic characters and is much better written than anything I could ever have come up with. Also, I think Shae is totally more bish than Harry.
Sincerely yours,
JK Rowling
meh. it definitly comes close- add a couple witches and wizards into the fray...AND BAM. then you might have something.
just kidding.
Dear Savannah,
I have been reading this series ever since the first chapter of WW, and wanted to let you know that it has a far superior and original plotline, with more realistic characters and is much better written than anything I could ever have come up with. Also, I think Shae is totally more bish than Harry.
Sincerely yours,
JK Rowling
meh. it definitly comes close- add a couple witches and wizards into the fray...AND BAM. then you might have something.
just kidding.
12/19/2008 c11 NRsaint
Hi there. I am a ghost reader who just wanted to let you know that I am reading and (very much) enjoying your story. Keep up the good (great,fanstasic) work!
'tis true.
Hi there. I am a ghost reader who just wanted to let you know that I am reading and (very much) enjoying your story. Keep up the good (great,fanstasic) work!
'tis true.
12/16/2008 c2 srix
Hello there! I just started this second part, and because of the note you placed at the beginning I must let you know of a tiny mistake in the 8th paragraph "stretching from the weight of MY luggage. In the corner resided an armoire".
That's it, know I'll resume my reading (^o^)/
Hello there! I just started this second part, and because of the note you placed at the beginning I must let you know of a tiny mistake in the 8th paragraph "stretching from the weight of MY luggage. In the corner resided an armoire".
That's it, know I'll resume my reading (^o^)/
12/14/2008 c60 g
Keep us updated on Fictionpress for a release date
Keep us updated on Fictionpress for a release date
12/12/2008 c13 Courtney Colver
Am I just completely oblivious or is the name of the "Poetess" not provided? I thought I missed her name before and tried to go back and find it, but I can't find it! Is she supposed to have a name and I've just been to ignorant and blind to see it? Or does she not have a name?
Am I just completely oblivious or is the name of the "Poetess" not provided? I thought I missed her name before and tried to go back and find it, but I can't find it! Is she supposed to have a name and I've just been to ignorant and blind to see it? Or does she not have a name?
12/12/2008 c12 Courtney Colver
This chapter reminded me that I'm not reviewing enough. I get so caught up in the story that I don't pause to review until I've finished the story and realized that I have yet to write a review. heh.. Anyway, I don't know if my review makes much difference or anything, but..oh well. I'm glad you cleared up the Laina and Shae thing. I was freaking out a bit. Anyway, I really like hearing the story from Shae's point of view. It was a great idea to format the story the way you have. In the first book, those rare chapters with a peak into Shae's point of view were really cool. Thanks for sharing your story!
This chapter reminded me that I'm not reviewing enough. I get so caught up in the story that I don't pause to review until I've finished the story and realized that I have yet to write a review. heh.. Anyway, I don't know if my review makes much difference or anything, but..oh well. I'm glad you cleared up the Laina and Shae thing. I was freaking out a bit. Anyway, I really like hearing the story from Shae's point of view. It was a great idea to format the story the way you have. In the first book, those rare chapters with a peak into Shae's point of view were really cool. Thanks for sharing your story!
12/3/2008 c59 2icthus
Hmm. I can understand your trump card, but that doesn't mean I have to like it any. If I don't find the end to Insurrection (the name of which makes me giggle . . . it makes me think of the Star Trek movie. Yes, I am a trekkie. Deal with it) when I've reached it, I will start throwing things at you. And some of them you will actually feel, if I concentrate hard enough.
2icthusHmm. I can understand your trump card, but that doesn't mean I have to like it any. If I don't find the end to Insurrection (the name of which makes me giggle . . . it makes me think of the Star Trek movie. Yes, I am a trekkie. Deal with it) when I've reached it, I will start throwing things at you. And some of them you will actually feel, if I concentrate hard enough.
12/3/2008 c58 icthus
In response to your bone: I think the smaller number of reviews came from people primarily interested in Shae and the Poetess being together. There was also the Laina and Carowyn situations, which almost turned me off from the story because they were set up to be replacements for them, and it was so not cool - even though they didn't end up that way at all, which I will be eternally grateful to you for. :)
In response to your comment in the first conclusions at the beginning of the 'chapter', which I completely forgot to respond to: I don't think I'd have ended this book with "Well. Now to bed." Not because of any been there done that kind of feelings, or whatever, but because it doesn't feel like an end to me. I'd probably be like, "Okay, next chapter now . . . oh wait. Huh. That was an annoying place to end, because I don't get any break from the mental work. Poop." Yes, I actually think (and say) poop when something goes differently than I meant it to. It's much more entertaining to say than shit, don't you think?
In response to your bone: I think the smaller number of reviews came from people primarily interested in Shae and the Poetess being together. There was also the Laina and Carowyn situations, which almost turned me off from the story because they were set up to be replacements for them, and it was so not cool - even though they didn't end up that way at all, which I will be eternally grateful to you for. :)
In response to your comment in the first conclusions at the beginning of the 'chapter', which I completely forgot to respond to: I don't think I'd have ended this book with "Well. Now to bed." Not because of any been there done that kind of feelings, or whatever, but because it doesn't feel like an end to me. I'd probably be like, "Okay, next chapter now . . . oh wait. Huh. That was an annoying place to end, because I don't get any break from the mental work. Poop." Yes, I actually think (and say) poop when something goes differently than I meant it to. It's much more entertaining to say than shit, don't you think?
12/3/2008 c57 icthus
Just a random comment: I had pictured Shrub as a nerdy 16 year old as well. I have no idea why, but I did. And your comment about the kitten is illogical. Nerdy 16 year old boys play with kittens, too. I've known several who do. Kittens are just that irresistable. I don't care that I spelled that wrong, by the way. I would, if it were not almost 4am now. Dang you for being a good author.
Just a random comment: I had pictured Shrub as a nerdy 16 year old as well. I have no idea why, but I did. And your comment about the kitten is illogical. Nerdy 16 year old boys play with kittens, too. I've known several who do. Kittens are just that irresistable. I don't care that I spelled that wrong, by the way. I would, if it were not almost 4am now. Dang you for being a good author.
12/3/2008 c56 icthus
I felt stress, panic, sadness, pretty much whatever the characters were feeling - with the exception of the presiding matron.
I did not get goosebumps, but I very nearly killed you when those in deep healing or whatever were deserted.
I did not like the italicized parts. The idea behind them is intriguing, but it did not flow well here I think. Maybe that is because I've first seen/heard it in a comedy, so the effect of the method is permanently contaminated as something reserved for comedy. But I also think it is cheesy, which is why it works well in a comedy. In something so serious I would definitely recommend a rewrite of that part.
My initial feeling at the end was one of impatience. You'd better already have some of the third book up, or else the shoe is aimed at you. It's almost as bad as the ending of the prologue of Twilight. *glare*
I am shocked by Charolyn's death. I should have been expecting it, as she was the most prominent figure and was making the presentation - thereby making her The Target, but I was for some reason prepared for Mercoush's death. That would have been terrible as well as give the Rebellion Leader emotional push behind the more logical compelling to right a corrupt government. It would have been reminiscent of season 8 in Charmed . . . Leo had to be taken so that the pain of loss would make the Charmed Ones more powerful in the upcoming big battle.
I am saddened by the torment that the Poetess is going through after not finding Shae's name on the survivor list.
I am happy about the knowledge that Shae survived - it may seem childish wishing on the surface, but I know he did and will eventually make his way back to her. I'm just hoping it's before she becomes too involved with Carowyn, because I don't think I could stand those strong emotional conflicts.
I encourage you to rethink the italicized parts and make them more fitting to the story, yet find an equally flowy way to parade the reader through every Hall. That was important, we got to see that it was bigger than anyone (except maybe Mercoush) thought to anticipate, and 'first hand'. The tricky part is figuring out a better way to go about it. I have absolutely no ideas how to even begin to go about it, and it will plague me until somebody does.
I plan to flame you if you don't already have some of book 3 up, or have plans to put it up in a very soon and reasonable (to your killer ending) time frame.
I will also purchase/create a flame thrower to flame you in person. (For an additional comment.)
I felt stress, panic, sadness, pretty much whatever the characters were feeling - with the exception of the presiding matron.
I did not get goosebumps, but I very nearly killed you when those in deep healing or whatever were deserted.
I did not like the italicized parts. The idea behind them is intriguing, but it did not flow well here I think. Maybe that is because I've first seen/heard it in a comedy, so the effect of the method is permanently contaminated as something reserved for comedy. But I also think it is cheesy, which is why it works well in a comedy. In something so serious I would definitely recommend a rewrite of that part.
My initial feeling at the end was one of impatience. You'd better already have some of the third book up, or else the shoe is aimed at you. It's almost as bad as the ending of the prologue of Twilight. *glare*
I am shocked by Charolyn's death. I should have been expecting it, as she was the most prominent figure and was making the presentation - thereby making her The Target, but I was for some reason prepared for Mercoush's death. That would have been terrible as well as give the Rebellion Leader emotional push behind the more logical compelling to right a corrupt government. It would have been reminiscent of season 8 in Charmed . . . Leo had to be taken so that the pain of loss would make the Charmed Ones more powerful in the upcoming big battle.
I am saddened by the torment that the Poetess is going through after not finding Shae's name on the survivor list.
I am happy about the knowledge that Shae survived - it may seem childish wishing on the surface, but I know he did and will eventually make his way back to her. I'm just hoping it's before she becomes too involved with Carowyn, because I don't think I could stand those strong emotional conflicts.
I encourage you to rethink the italicized parts and make them more fitting to the story, yet find an equally flowy way to parade the reader through every Hall. That was important, we got to see that it was bigger than anyone (except maybe Mercoush) thought to anticipate, and 'first hand'. The tricky part is figuring out a better way to go about it. I have absolutely no ideas how to even begin to go about it, and it will plague me until somebody does.
I plan to flame you if you don't already have some of book 3 up, or have plans to put it up in a very soon and reasonable (to your killer ending) time frame.
I will also purchase/create a flame thrower to flame you in person. (For an additional comment.)
12/3/2008 c55 icthus
And it's time for . . . you guessed it, more whining about selfish people. What else would happen, when there was a scene with Carowyn and the Poetess? Here goes: Why the freaking a is she only not giving in to her selfish desire to use Carowyn's body pretending it is Shae ONLY because there was so much else on her plate that she didn't want to deal with his (or her own) emotions?
How selfish is this Poetess that I love and kind of despise at the same time? Because emotional confusion in someone else only seems to matter if she has to 'deal' with it. The shoe is directed at her head now, followed by a spoon, a dagger handle (the dagger part was lost, don't worry), and a spitball.
And it's time for . . . you guessed it, more whining about selfish people. What else would happen, when there was a scene with Carowyn and the Poetess? Here goes: Why the freaking a is she only not giving in to her selfish desire to use Carowyn's body pretending it is Shae ONLY because there was so much else on her plate that she didn't want to deal with his (or her own) emotions?
How selfish is this Poetess that I love and kind of despise at the same time? Because emotional confusion in someone else only seems to matter if she has to 'deal' with it. The shoe is directed at her head now, followed by a spoon, a dagger handle (the dagger part was lost, don't worry), and a spitball.
12/3/2008 c54 icthus
Before I read the chapter, when I first read this chapter title (back when you had given me the scare of my life with that note about taking Apostasy down, and I opened the drop down chapter list and scrolled down to the bottom to make sure you had changed your mind), my first thought was, "Oh. I guess the Poetess will become the Empress. Huh." Am I really so lame that that is the only conclusion I could come to after reading the chapter title? I guess so. Anyway, I'm going to read the chapter now and finish this review later. Kay?
Okay, I've only gotten to the part where the Empress is entering the room, but before I forget . . . 'I was standing thus when a small, hidden door was slid open by two small, white hands, and a thin figure stepped forward, approaching with gowns even larger and longer than my own. “Welcome,” someone said behind me.' That doesn't make sense. If the hidden door was opened behind the Poetess, how could she know that the person had gowns even larger and longer than hers? And the person speaking . . . assuming she had heard the footsteps and skirts rustling (which I am doing, and I think the description of the thin figure needs to be changed so it isn't based on sight but on hearing - which also makes it seem less weird that it takes the Poetess so long to turn around), she would be able to tell that there was only one person. It seems odd that that person would be referred to simply as someone. Something more like . . . '"Welcome," the newcomer said before I could turn around.' Anyway. Back to reading. Sorry if I'm being nitpicky.
I'm back. I think I'm being nitpicky again. When describing the Empress' son, you wrote something like (sorry, forgot to copy and paste) 'He was beautiful, with her brown hair . . . ' I had to re-read that a couple times to make sense of it. Maybe replace 'her' with 'the Empress'' to make it clearer.
This was a good chapter, and I'm slightly irked at you. It's 3am, and you're costing me my sleep, but I can't stop reading, Not now, not so close to the end.
Before I read the chapter, when I first read this chapter title (back when you had given me the scare of my life with that note about taking Apostasy down, and I opened the drop down chapter list and scrolled down to the bottom to make sure you had changed your mind), my first thought was, "Oh. I guess the Poetess will become the Empress. Huh." Am I really so lame that that is the only conclusion I could come to after reading the chapter title? I guess so. Anyway, I'm going to read the chapter now and finish this review later. Kay?
Okay, I've only gotten to the part where the Empress is entering the room, but before I forget . . . 'I was standing thus when a small, hidden door was slid open by two small, white hands, and a thin figure stepped forward, approaching with gowns even larger and longer than my own. “Welcome,” someone said behind me.' That doesn't make sense. If the hidden door was opened behind the Poetess, how could she know that the person had gowns even larger and longer than hers? And the person speaking . . . assuming she had heard the footsteps and skirts rustling (which I am doing, and I think the description of the thin figure needs to be changed so it isn't based on sight but on hearing - which also makes it seem less weird that it takes the Poetess so long to turn around), she would be able to tell that there was only one person. It seems odd that that person would be referred to simply as someone. Something more like . . . '"Welcome," the newcomer said before I could turn around.' Anyway. Back to reading. Sorry if I'm being nitpicky.
I'm back. I think I'm being nitpicky again. When describing the Empress' son, you wrote something like (sorry, forgot to copy and paste) 'He was beautiful, with her brown hair . . . ' I had to re-read that a couple times to make sense of it. Maybe replace 'her' with 'the Empress'' to make it clearer.
This was a good chapter, and I'm slightly irked at you. It's 3am, and you're costing me my sleep, but I can't stop reading, Not now, not so close to the end.