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for Glitters Of Shattered Hope

8/10/2005 c9 Neng
okay okay...thus far, i've been loving the story...it has the appeal to make you continue wanting more...continue clicking the tab in hopes that there's a next chapter...and another after that...and another...the writer here has developed the plot and relationships rather smoothly and comfortably...makes you feel at peace with how things are turning out...the words the writer used makes you imagine too...she shows you how you should feel or see things, and not tell you to. so, i guess her whole idea gets through to each person differently and beautifully in its own way...but gets thru nonetheless...

but one thing...didnt like how the writer ended chapter 8...added up with the telling title of the short story...the readers might just come to suspect the ending...but then again, it would probably be what the writer wanted for a bomb of an ending with omigoshly-wahlau-eh-ing ending...just mayb. no spoilers here, and no pressure, alexialynne...haha

really looking forward to the final chapter...post it quick!
8/10/2005 c8 Neng
again,the convo between belle and will seemed too formal...

but this chapter makes me continue to ponder...why are girls so darn good with romantic parts? their words just, transcends...
8/10/2005 c7 Neng
aspens play a big role in your story, it would seem. it sets the mood. nice move there. very tantalizing...

and Belle! damn that woman. so stubborn...haha. joking.
8/10/2005 c6 Neng
Again, the two parts to each chapter really really appealed to me. i find the present part to be very intoxicating...keeps you wanting more and more.

but then again, i didnt really like the conversational parts between the two. mayb it was the fad-of-the-time, but i think it's too formal...is strained a proper word here?

but don't let my silly opinions get to you...you can't satisfy every freaking soul who's gonna read ur works. as long as u like it, i love it...
8/10/2005 c5 Neng
okayz...big contrast here...it is your character after all...but i think the character development of will sorta took a major twist. he's a general,right? but he too can act all too childish...it is, i take, the writer's own desire to see childishness in the face of seriousness at times too...to take things lightly once in a while...

but then again, the relationship between the two lovebirds is pretty real and convincing...it's like eating chocolate, makes ur insides feel so darn freaking good...
8/10/2005 c4 Neng
omg! i love this chapter best. no doubt bout it...not gonna goddamn review it...it's just...nice!
8/10/2005 c3 Neng
know what really appealed to me...the two parts running simultaneously in each chapter...

and then, there are your characters...like every great character in every story, they always seem all too familiar/similar,no? the general and Belle aren't to be excluded...it seems you're too stuck in the cycle of ideal character features? hey, i'm not saying that's bad,just stating stuff...nevertheless,you made will portray enough of a post-war general to just put us into his shoes...
8/10/2005 c2 Neng
hahaha...that first paragraph...seems all too familiar...

a subtle touch with the intro, which hints to much more interesting areas yet to come...
8/5/2005 c8 4annicel
-sniff sniff- He died didn't he? That's so sad! I kind of suspected as much, but still... Poor Bella.

On another note, I love the symbolism you have going with the aspens. Nice touch. How ever did you come up with that? Also, it's amazing how much these characters have developed in such a short time. You're awesome.

Hurry up with the next chapter! I'm dying to see what happens next! :o)
8/5/2005 c7 annicel
Big mean head! Leaving Bella like that... Guys are so stupid. Stupid! lol No, I understand why he's leaving. It just sucks, ya know? I hope everything turns out ok...
8/5/2005 c6 annicel
I like how William and Bella's relationship is developing. It's so adorable how he watches out for her. I only hope that they can stay this happy... Somehow, I don't think they can, though...
8/5/2005 c5 annicel
Aw! What a sweet chapter! William is so adorable. I love his shyness.

“I was mesmerized by the aspens. They are just… well…mesmerizing. I saw the way they shimmered in silver during summer and now they are sparkling in shades of gold during autumn…they look like glitters of scattered hope - utterly beautiful…enchanting.” This is absolutely beautiful. You're so good with words!
8/5/2005 c1 4Kiya Sama
I read through this at work but couldn't reply there for some reason, so I'm doing so now. I usually stay away from historical stories but I've got to say that yours is very interesting so far. Wonderful imagery and you've managed to paint such 'real' characters. Good luck to you as you continue! You definitely have the talent.
8/5/2005 c4 4annicel
"Quiet footsteps snapped the fallen twigs to life" I really love that line. Nice imagery. Oh, and go Bella! lol It's about time someone snapped him out of his stupor! Really good so far... On to Chapter 5...
8/5/2005 c3 annicel
Aw... Poor William. Let's hope that Annabella can pull him out of his shell, and back into the light... Your physical descriptions of Bella (it feels so weird saying that name, b/c my character was Bella, too! lol) and William are very detailed and vivid. I like that. I wonder why he's so depressed...?
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