for The Crawling Ones11/18/2005 c5 
3V3n7u5
And finally a coherent plot, actual character developement, proofreading and a song by a band that I've never heard of before. What more can we ask of you Pidgeon? Seriously, great chapter. And you're right, they are zombies, what more of a plan do you need. Just make sure that they have enough ammo. Granted, it would be fun to see them use their close-quarters weapons as well.
3V3n7u5And finally a coherent plot, actual character developement, proofreading and a song by a band that I've never heard of before. What more can we ask of you Pidgeon? Seriously, great chapter. And you're right, they are zombies, what more of a plan do you need. Just make sure that they have enough ammo. Granted, it would be fun to see them use their close-quarters weapons as well.
11/12/2005 c5 1Missingno
It's getting there. Please hurry up with the next chapter. I really want to see what happens next! It's a great story.
1MissingnoIt's getting there. Please hurry up with the next chapter. I really want to see what happens next! It's a great story.
10/1/2005 c4 Missingno
Wow. Nice story, Jason. If you don't know who I am, think Michael's Pokemon-obssesed little sister. This is really funny! I hope you're working on the next chapter! The assult rifel from Halo 2... the guns you use on there are based off real guns? Michael never told me that... oh, well. Just hurry up with the next chapter, 'tay?
Wow. Nice story, Jason. If you don't know who I am, think Michael's Pokemon-obssesed little sister. This is really funny! I hope you're working on the next chapter! The assult rifel from Halo 2... the guns you use on there are based off real guns? Michael never told me that... oh, well. Just hurry up with the next chapter, 'tay?
9/15/2005 c4 3V3n7u5
How many times do we have to say it Toxic, PROOFREAD YOUR STORY! That's the only thing ever wrong with it. Also, I would suggest changing your plan a little, unless you truly mean to "screw" it? And why did you have to suggest sending Davy in with Stephen, Davy isn't black.
3V3n7u5How many times do we have to say it Toxic, PROOFREAD YOUR STORY! That's the only thing ever wrong with it. Also, I would suggest changing your plan a little, unless you truly mean to "screw" it? And why did you have to suggest sending Davy in with Stephen, Davy isn't black.
8/19/2005 c3 10kytoahc
Uhm... so what's going on here? We're not at school? The authorities are taking care of it? Hmm? This chapter confuses me, as it doesn't really seem to have a point in the plot. It's still funny though. Write the next chapter, hmm? I want to know what's going to happen next.
10kytoahcUhm... so what's going on here? We're not at school? The authorities are taking care of it? Hmm? This chapter confuses me, as it doesn't really seem to have a point in the plot. It's still funny though. Write the next chapter, hmm? I want to know what's going to happen next.
8/19/2005 c3 3V3n7u5
I don't know HOW you can make this chapter any funnier. Just the plain randomness of "Oh. Sorry. Lost my train of Christmas cakes..." is enough to set me into a laughing fit (never mind Jason wandering into a ditch). By the way, nice job on the rewrite, it looks a lot better. My only concern is when the team is going to get back to school...but I guess that'll be delt with at another date. My final comment: Holy freakin' crap this rules!
3V3n7u5I don't know HOW you can make this chapter any funnier. Just the plain randomness of "Oh. Sorry. Lost my train of Christmas cakes..." is enough to set me into a laughing fit (never mind Jason wandering into a ditch). By the way, nice job on the rewrite, it looks a lot better. My only concern is when the team is going to get back to school...but I guess that'll be delt with at another date. My final comment: Holy freakin' crap this rules!
8/19/2005 c3 1JRRToken
Arbys... Reuben rules! Anyway the story is making good progress. A flip flop? And halibut?
1JRRTokenArbys... Reuben rules! Anyway the story is making good progress. A flip flop? And halibut?
8/18/2005 c3 3Shadow-Love
This isn't a professional story, i think we can pretty much all see that, but i think that this way is a hell of alot better then if it was to be put into a droony way. It's funny (at times) and the confusion (as in mine) keeps me coming back, reading the next chapter. I just think a ity bity bit more description is needed because theyre too short. (Oh and i like the fact you did translations)
3Shadow-LoveThis isn't a professional story, i think we can pretty much all see that, but i think that this way is a hell of alot better then if it was to be put into a droony way. It's funny (at times) and the confusion (as in mine) keeps me coming back, reading the next chapter. I just think a ity bity bit more description is needed because theyre too short. (Oh and i like the fact you did translations)
8/16/2005 c1 1JRRToken
great story so far. Keep up the good work. (not a good reviewer) I think there were a couple of errors though
1JRRTokengreat story so far. Keep up the good work. (not a good reviewer) I think there were a couple of errors though
8/13/2005 c1 10kytoahc
Dude! This is awesome. Nice choice with the Jackhammer shotgun, by the way. I completely forgot about that one (somehow).H&K G36C RULES!
10kytoahcDude! This is awesome. Nice choice with the Jackhammer shotgun, by the way. I completely forgot about that one (somehow).H&K G36C RULES!
8/13/2005 c1 5Meursault
My favorite line:
"The government was using a mind altering drug in the cafeteria food that made the subject go slightly cannibalistic and easily agitated. "
Hooray for zombies
5MeursaultMy favorite line:
"The government was using a mind altering drug in the cafeteria food that made the subject go slightly cannibalistic and easily agitated. "
Hooray for zombies
8/13/2005 c2 3V3n7u5
Well, now that I've read the second chapter I can safely say that this story is hilarious. I would however like to reiterate my past comment that you should go back and profread your chapters. While the writing style is okay and the vocabulary (at least what you tried to use) is good, you still have many misspellings and gramatical errors. All in all, a good story. I would certainly like to read more.
3V3n7u5Well, now that I've read the second chapter I can safely say that this story is hilarious. I would however like to reiterate my past comment that you should go back and profread your chapters. While the writing style is okay and the vocabulary (at least what you tried to use) is good, you still have many misspellings and gramatical errors. All in all, a good story. I would certainly like to read more.
8/13/2005 c1 V3n7u5
Wow, that was really good. I especially the spooky hand movements combined with opposite eye rolling. I'm still not sure what that means exactly, but it was funny. I also like the addition of the evil monkey in the School Board's offices...that would explain a lot.
The only thing I think I could correct in this is the grammar. Quite a few times you wrote "student" when you clearly meant it to be plural. Aside from rereading it to check for such mistakes I would say that this is a very well written story. Update soon.
Wow, that was really good. I especially the spooky hand movements combined with opposite eye rolling. I'm still not sure what that means exactly, but it was funny. I also like the addition of the evil monkey in the School Board's offices...that would explain a lot.
The only thing I think I could correct in this is the grammar. Quite a few times you wrote "student" when you clearly meant it to be plural. Aside from rereading it to check for such mistakes I would say that this is a very well written story. Update soon.