for Hell Found Me9/19/2005 c1 
7Jak Refynae
Pretty good, I like twisting things out of little peices. You should have paid the $2.80 and sent it in.Interesting.
7Jak RefynaePretty good, I like twisting things out of little peices. You should have paid the $2.80 and sent it in.Interesting.
8/22/2005 c1 3oohsnapp
Wow. I'm searching up fics that has the same title as you, wondering if they entered it in that contest thing. I was going to do the same, but then I hadn't realized that you had to pay so I didn't bother and just posted it here. I'm totally consumed by your one shot. It was nothing that I would have expected, but everyone is unique. I loved it and keep up the great work!
3oohsnappWow. I'm searching up fics that has the same title as you, wondering if they entered it in that contest thing. I was going to do the same, but then I hadn't realized that you had to pay so I didn't bother and just posted it here. I'm totally consumed by your one shot. It was nothing that I would have expected, but everyone is unique. I loved it and keep up the great work!
8/17/2005 c1 16Theory Of The 4th Dimension
Nice touch. I love the last words in the ending. I'm glad you wrote the flashbacks, it keeps a quality of suspense in the story. Though I wish you could be more straightforward with your sentences. I highly discourage using passive forms in sentences. And please lower the number of adverbs. I quote from Stephen King when I say, "The path to hell is paved with adverbs."...which is quite ironic since this is what this story is about!hehe...anyway, it is a great story! Too bad you never got to submit it! It would have made an interesting read to a greater number of people. Good luck!=)
16Theory Of The 4th DimensionNice touch. I love the last words in the ending. I'm glad you wrote the flashbacks, it keeps a quality of suspense in the story. Though I wish you could be more straightforward with your sentences. I highly discourage using passive forms in sentences. And please lower the number of adverbs. I quote from Stephen King when I say, "The path to hell is paved with adverbs."...which is quite ironic since this is what this story is about!hehe...anyway, it is a great story! Too bad you never got to submit it! It would have made an interesting read to a greater number of people. Good luck!=)
8/16/2005 c1 20Pheobe Meryll
That's beautiful! You have a very clear, descriptive syle and got you message across wonderfully. I like the way you set it up with flashbacks and the poetic rythm of "hell found me...hell crept closer..." It's very original.
I found few editing mistakes...the sixth paragraph into the story, you captialized "awakened" when you shouldn't have. The only other mistake I found was when you described the child as "trying to keep my body as far away from the grasping appendages"...as possible? You ended it there. Anyway, those were the only mistakes I noticed, and overall I think if you'd entered the contest you could very well have won.
I hope you write more! This is going on my favorites. Best luck.
20Pheobe MeryllThat's beautiful! You have a very clear, descriptive syle and got you message across wonderfully. I like the way you set it up with flashbacks and the poetic rythm of "hell found me...hell crept closer..." It's very original.
I found few editing mistakes...the sixth paragraph into the story, you captialized "awakened" when you shouldn't have. The only other mistake I found was when you described the child as "trying to keep my body as far away from the grasping appendages"...as possible? You ended it there. Anyway, those were the only mistakes I noticed, and overall I think if you'd entered the contest you could very well have won.
I hope you write more! This is going on my favorites. Best luck.
8/15/2005 c1 28Darthen
Wow, that was cool. I like the whole Idea behind the story and I like where you went with it. It was very cool. Mystical and cool.
28DarthenWow, that was cool. I like the whole Idea behind the story and I like where you went with it. It was very cool. Mystical and cool.
8/15/2005 c1 11darkofnight
I tried to enter the same contest. I liked yours a lot. It was very cool, and I love your use of words. Very intellectual.
11darkofnightI tried to enter the same contest. I liked yours a lot. It was very cool, and I love your use of words. Very intellectual.