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for Tales from the Land of the Dead: Real Life Fables

10/4/2006 c1 4Sakka-Fenikkusu
Excellent opening chapter! I loved the imagery. Everything was perfectly clear in my mind. I would've used less parentheses, but I don't object to it. I think my favorite line is "With pity they stare. With distrust they stare. With disgust, with hatred. (Love.)" Great work. Keep it up. -Sakka-Fenikkusu
7/9/2006 c1 7Fresh C
Well, I like the way you write. You describe things well and your vocabulary is excellent. But I had no idea what you were getting at. I understand what's happening, but I feel that I missed the point of the story completely. What is the meaning of it? What is the theme or message?

You seem like the type of person who most certainly had a purpose in mind while writing, but I'm sorry to say I just didn't understand it.

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