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4/27/2006 c1 Eldarwen Telrunya
Awsome story. I've only read the first chapter, but I'll read the rest later.
4/27/2006 c13 13Shadowhound
Another interesting chapter. I liked how you portrayed Liel's insanity. Very...random. I didn't have any problems with it, so I can't fill up pages upon pages with ranting and raving. So sorry. Good story, I hope to see more soon.

Shadowhound
4/27/2006 c13 4Phoenix Wing
That was absolutely, totally brilliant. I LOVED that chapter! Leil's character is brilliantly done and now I'm inspired to write something involving a mad person. Lovely, lovely, lovely.

As far as French goes, I totally understand what it's like having a teacher who thinks your brain is made of mush. One of the Spanish teachers (that I luckily haven't had) apparently makes her students draw a lot of pictures or something else really random. I was speaking on the part of my procrastination; way too much I was supposed to be doing. I'm super excited for summer mostly because the Monday after school gets out, I'm going to Italy!

Congrats on the 100 reviews and happy super-belated birthday! (only 10 days late ^_^) Again, loved the chapter.
4/27/2006 c12 Celyn
Cool stuff. You are gathering your characters together... yay!
4/23/2006 c12 13Shadowhound
Yes! another chapter!

i'm still curious about the history between Fiacra's March and the Lone Guard. do you think you will get around to telling a bit about that?

excellent chapter. any idea when the net chapter goes up? take your time, i don't want to rush you. just keep up the good work. hope to see more soon,

Shadowhound
4/23/2006 c12 4Phoenix Wing
Oh goodie, you finally updated this one. Terrific way to prolong an already dangerous amount of procrastination. ^_^ Took a while to figure out what happened/was happening but it was still excellent. It'd be nice to have another update before the end of the month. So I take it you don't enjoy French all too terribly much; unless you do enjoy it a lot but you were just incredibly bored at the time. I absolutely love my Spanish class mostly because we can get so off track and silly (except we have these insanely stupid videos with this guy named Francisco that we have to watch a lot). At least there's not too much school left! Seven weeks until summer for me.
4/22/2006 c12 20Qu33n of Spades
*much dancing and rejoicing and singing and such-like*

Ahem. Yes. Well, as you can tell, I'm rather pleased that you have updated. I have been waiting rather (im)patiently for an update. I can't wait to see how this story is going to unfold even more. I truly am enjoying this.

My only thing was that I couldn't quite remember who Falcha was and who Isa was, but that may be because I haven't read for a while. It took me a minute to figure out which was which. :-D

Looking forward to reading more!
4/22/2006 c12 12Lccorp2
Harr.

Archdemon Lord Duffikus:

Now, my Creator's gone over most of this with you, hmm? you know what he said, so...
4/13/2006 c1 6McQuinn
And how could a fifteen-year-old ever hope to assume the throne. - Question mark?

We are ready to leave, if you will have us, prince - Capitolize "Prince."

So, our perhaps prince, perhaps not-prince, will you have us with you?” - Same.

Dude, I love this! I wish I would've read it sooner. It would've taken care of a couple of boring, dreary nights. I have to say that I like Tamen - he seems like he has a good head on his shoulders, but he did act a little...like a sissy in this chapter. I mean, I understand that his parents died, but I would've been enraged instead of confused/grief-stricken when talking to the accused murderer. And when I say "enraged" I mean kicking and screaming, and punching and spitting, etc. I also felt that it was kind of weird that most (I think) of the guards and soldiers followed Tamen without any hesitancy. But I liked the fact that they were loyal - this will at least give you more characters that Tamen will be familiar with when he ventures off to the Wilds.

Speaking of the "Wilds." I was wondering if you ever saw "The Island." It kind of reminds me of this. Well, brief summary if you haven't seen: Rich people (in the future) pay off a scientist to make a clone of themselves as back-up, in case they get a disease and need a spare body part from the clone. Even though I haven't found out much about the Wilds yet, I'm figuring it's a place where they keep "spares." Cloned princes, princesses, mages, etc. as sort of a protection method. It would be cool if I was right.

Anyway, did I mention that I absolutely love your writing style? You have a way with words, friend. Nothing is awkward, paragraphs are fresh, interesting and full, the chapter is satisfying. I love it. Can't wait to read the rest.

-McQuinn
4/4/2006 c11 20Qu33n of Spades
This is also very good and - what? you haven't updated since january? *whines* it's just getting good. you must finish this. I'm really enjoying it and it's disappointing to find that you haven't done any more.

Anyway, this chapter was very good, though once again I would advise you to read it out loud to yourself and listen to how it sounds. Some of the sentences are a *tad* bit too long, which makes them difficult to read.

Overall, very nice, and I look forward to reading more in the *near* future. ;-)
4/4/2006 c10 Qu33n of Spades
Definitely loving this very much. I love the dialogue between Duana, Aran, and Mor. Also much-loved is the description of the differences between Aran's sibilings, himself, and his cousins.

I don't really have acy complaints, except maybe in the beginning you should perhaps read it out loud to see if a few of the sentences are a little to long. That's my only qualm. :-)
4/4/2006 c9 Qu33n of Spades
This is very nice. I like how you tell the conversation between Aldia's father and Broachan, especially how you describe his hand and the explanations of things and the thoughts going 'round in Alida's head. It keeps it interesting, which it most certainly is.
4/4/2006 c8 Qu33n of Spades
I like this very much. :-) Duana has become a lot easier to relate to in this chapter, and this new development with Leil is very interesting. It seems to me like he's a bit more than what Duana bargained for, eh?

I keep itching to know more about the dreamscape - it's such a wonderful, fascinating idea, I'm always excited when it comes up. :-)
4/3/2006 c7 Qu33n of Spades
Hoo hoo! I'm liking the sound of this. It's got that whole Lion King feel to it. You know, when Rafiki convinces Simba to go back and set things right in the Pridelands? That's ths final scene right here at the end of this chapter.

I'm liking this very much, so excuse me if I finish this here and continue on with the story. :-)
4/3/2006 c6 Qu33n of Spades
I'm very curious about that last italic bit there. Very interesting. I'm wondering if that's Leil and Duana, or some different characters? I'm not entirely sure.

You have one typpo in the sixth paragraph, where she's talking about dry skin "...a bit around the corners of my mother and my elbows." Probably should be "mouth."
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