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for Napoleon Bonaparte

7/3/2008 c1 2lovehopeandwar
In your author's note you put I hope that you enjoy it if anyone reads it! I thoroughly enjoyed it and think that you are talented to no end! Despite it being condensed you portryed your point across in a clear and succinct way which certainly grasped my attention. I am very fond of Napoleon too so I could relate to the essay making it more realistic for me! Well done again and KEEP WRITING! THE WORLD NEEDS SKILLED PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
7/3/2008 c1 Chrissie i cn review2timesanon
I am reviewing this anonymous as if I were to review it with my username I could only do so once! As an editor I would like to congratulate you on your impeccable use of punctuation, spelling and grammer also I love history and your essay was great fun and very informative to read!
12/19/2007 c1 12la fleur ephemeral
First of all, I, too, look up to Napoleon. Although I do feel he made many mistakes and that he needlessly threw away the lives of many men for partly France's glory and partly his own, I understand he was a man, a genius, and a leader who truly did care for his people. Your essay provides a very clear view of Napoleon's determination and intelligence, and for having been done from memory, it is fairly accurate. However, it is always best to check your sources and find the correct information.

When writing an essay, even if limited to a small number of paragraphs, always include the most specific and relevant information. Napoleon was not born in the "city of Corsica", but his was born in the city of Ajaccio on the isle of Corsica. Also, you forgot to include that Napoleon marched into Russia with 600,0 troops and returned with 40,0-70,0. This fact would have portrayed a much more powerful meaning of the word "loss" when considering Napoleon's fall from power. You also seemed to have left out Napoleon's first exile to the isle of Elba, as well as his escape back into France and how it led to the Battle of Waterloo.

Also, there are many grammatical mistakes throughout the paper. Missing and improperly used commas, missing semi-colons, etc. And though you do transition nicely here, consider placing the fourth paragraph before the third. Chronologically, it makes much more sense. Of course, this was written when you were a sophomore.

Overall, this is a nice essay and a good starting point. It exudes your enthusiam for Napoleon, and it casts him in a light that befits his gifts to man and to the world. Keep writing and keep learning!
11/7/2005 c1 5Kantar
you know that Jake ahs already read this...and corrected it twice, but both times you were all "nevermind...here *sends file*"buyt anywayshow much did you get on it?

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