for Vampire Falling8/9/2011 c15 DEE
OMG! Ghoul's I am so afraid. I love this chapter is Artemis some kind creature hunter and what about Lexy! Something big is gong to happen isn't it?
I want to know what happens next!
OMG! Ghoul's I am so afraid. I love this chapter is Artemis some kind creature hunter and what about Lexy! Something big is gong to happen isn't it?
I want to know what happens next!
12/24/2006 c1 Leslie Sampson
only reading the first chapter i could tell that it is very interesting. i could really get into the story but i dont have the time right now; once im free, i'll get deeper into the plot.
only reading the first chapter i could tell that it is very interesting. i could really get into the story but i dont have the time right now; once im free, i'll get deeper into the plot.
7/24/2006 c10 
9The Gobbler
Oh no! I don't want Artemis to leave. I think it would be more hurtful for Lexy if he did... anywho, good job, not as high-paced as the last few, but good nonetheless. I was surprised by James' reaction to the fact that Artemis was a vampire and had attacked Kat. Other than that, good job.
9The GobblerOh no! I don't want Artemis to leave. I think it would be more hurtful for Lexy if he did... anywho, good job, not as high-paced as the last few, but good nonetheless. I was surprised by James' reaction to the fact that Artemis was a vampire and had attacked Kat. Other than that, good job.
7/18/2006 c9 The Gobbler
I liked Lexy's reaction to Artemis being a vampire; her shunning him for it would be angsty, but I like this. I loved when Artemis said, "... and now you don't want to play anymore." Just imagining him saying that with an accent was sweet. I thought maybe you could have described what kind of accent he had, like British or Spanish or Transylvanian or whatnot. I just had a few suggestions: at the beginning, when Artemis is talking to Danny, he says, "You scum you discus me!" it should be "disgust" instead of "discus". I also thought it was convenient that Hauri just let them go, and will be interesting later on, but I thought it was a bit unrealistic. They went to all that trouble to kidnap her and then just let her go? I dunno. But I'll be excited to learn more about Artemis' past and about Hauri, and about sires as well.
I liked Lexy's reaction to Artemis being a vampire; her shunning him for it would be angsty, but I like this. I loved when Artemis said, "... and now you don't want to play anymore." Just imagining him saying that with an accent was sweet. I thought maybe you could have described what kind of accent he had, like British or Spanish or Transylvanian or whatnot. I just had a few suggestions: at the beginning, when Artemis is talking to Danny, he says, "You scum you discus me!" it should be "disgust" instead of "discus". I also thought it was convenient that Hauri just let them go, and will be interesting later on, but I thought it was a bit unrealistic. They went to all that trouble to kidnap her and then just let her go? I dunno. But I'll be excited to learn more about Artemis' past and about Hauri, and about sires as well.
6/21/2006 c8 The Gobbler
Wow... well, I wasn't expecting that. Good plot twist, though, I like it. The story's going somewhere now, connecting with the first chapter-I like it. You've also set up lots of good old angsty problems for Artemis to deal with, which is good.
Wow... well, I wasn't expecting that. Good plot twist, though, I like it. The story's going somewhere now, connecting with the first chapter-I like it. You've also set up lots of good old angsty problems for Artemis to deal with, which is good.
6/21/2006 c7 The Gobbler
Whew! Intense. The fight scene was cool, but a little unrealistic, I think. It looks like Artemis has gotten some memories back... it'll be interesting to see what his past really is.
Whew! Intense. The fight scene was cool, but a little unrealistic, I think. It looks like Artemis has gotten some memories back... it'll be interesting to see what his past really is.
4/23/2006 c1 6Raven Kay
Thanks for reviewing! Hope you continue to read. As for your first chapter, it was pretty good. There was some grammar errors and such that you might want to look over. Elaborate what it is like down there and what the guy looks like. Good luck and I shall continue reading soon!
6Raven KayThanks for reviewing! Hope you continue to read. As for your first chapter, it was pretty good. There was some grammar errors and such that you might want to look over. Elaborate what it is like down there and what the guy looks like. Good luck and I shall continue reading soon!
4/20/2006 c6 9The Gobbler
Yay! This was a really good chapter. I liked the part about size... it made me laugh, and I liked the end, too. Artemis never fails to be awesome and adorable, he's definitely my favorite. Good job.
9The GobblerYay! This was a really good chapter. I liked the part about size... it made me laugh, and I liked the end, too. Artemis never fails to be awesome and adorable, he's definitely my favorite. Good job.
3/28/2006 c5 The Gobbler
Coolio! This chapter was good... I thought the confusion between Artemis and Lexy was maybe overdone a little bit, but only a little. I'm also wondering if the Danny guy from the first chapter will make a reappearance... it seems strange that he just popped in and then left. But I still think Artemis is absolutely adorable and I like the plot so far... good job!
Coolio! This chapter was good... I thought the confusion between Artemis and Lexy was maybe overdone a little bit, but only a little. I'm also wondering if the Danny guy from the first chapter will make a reappearance... it seems strange that he just popped in and then left. But I still think Artemis is absolutely adorable and I like the plot so far... good job!
2/8/2006 c4 The Gobbler
ACK! I'm sorry I haven't reviewed this in so long... I think I must've missed the alert...
Anyway, I liked this chapter. I liked the foreshadowing with the storm and Lexy's nightmare, and I absolutely LOVE Artemis. He's so cute. Good job, keep writing!
ACK! I'm sorry I haven't reviewed this in so long... I think I must've missed the alert...
Anyway, I liked this chapter. I liked the foreshadowing with the storm and Lexy's nightmare, and I absolutely LOVE Artemis. He's so cute. Good job, keep writing!
11/27/2005 c3 The Gobbler
Aw, this was a cute chapter. The only mistakes I want to point out are spelling mistakes... sorry for being picky. But it should be "follow", not "fallow", and "scars", not "scares". But those could just be typos, I guess... but good job! I liked thsi chapter. It was adorable.
Aw, this was a cute chapter. The only mistakes I want to point out are spelling mistakes... sorry for being picky. But it should be "follow", not "fallow", and "scars", not "scares". But those could just be typos, I guess... but good job! I liked thsi chapter. It was adorable.
11/13/2005 c1 The Gobbler
This sounds like it could be really good, but I got confused at the end. Is Danny the one in the hole? Or did someone else attack her? I liked the beginning, all the loose ends you leave make someone want to keep reading. I think if you clarified the end then this would be great.
This sounds like it could be really good, but I got confused at the end. Is Danny the one in the hole? Or did someone else attack her? I liked the beginning, all the loose ends you leave make someone want to keep reading. I think if you clarified the end then this would be great.