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for To Love A Prince

1/16/2007 c7 3pleasebequiet
he's having feelings!*jumps up and down, dancing happy dance*
1/15/2007 c7 1eliza-smiles
...i like it... me thinks it shall be oh soo interesting to see what happens, 'cause you ould go the obviuos way but on this site i have learnt never to expect what is obvious...cha its true...any ways cant wait for an update, cheers
1/15/2007 c1 2IvoryShadow
I see that you have potential, but there are a few things on which you can improve.

This is what you wrote as an introduction. It's fine, but there are several things you can tweak to make it even better.

His extremely loud screams could be heard from all over the castle. Servants and butlers scurried around, afraid of the wrath of their king in his present mood. The work around the royal castle seemed to turn up a notch after that. The cooks in the massive kitchens of the castle started preparing lunch extra fast, the maids who were gossiping and laughing with each other immediately broke apart and went to their separate work assignments and gardeners started trimming bushes with the scrutiny of a brain surgeon.

I'll begin with the first sentence:

His extremely loud screams could be heard from all over the castle.

The problem with this line is that it doesn't really have an impact on the reader. We know what you're trying to get at, but it doesn't, you know...impact. For example, instead of saying extremely loud screams, you could've put in something like decible-defying screeches. I'm not sure how to explain this, but describe things in unexpected ways...I guess.

I can beta and/or edit your stories for you if you want. Mail me if you want my help.

Keep up the good work. You'll get better at it.
1/14/2007 c6 5YoungInside
Thank you so much for finally updating. Haha. I've been reading this story since..before I made this account and have been waiting for you to update for so long! Your characters seem very real and I just love Daniel! Haha.

It's very good except for a few spelling mistakes here and there. Such as “Be my guess,”

It should have been be my guest. But overall, very good. Update soon!
11/5/2006 c5 alakazam05
Please update soon! I'd like to see how Angela's going to affect Daniel even more. It's subtle and yet it strikes a chord.
2/21/2006 c4 Tyra Kaelar
Nice, very nice. Your characters are very 3-d, and you do a great job of getting inside thier heads, looking forward to Angela continuing to verbaling beat him over the head, lol. BTW luved your mean girls reference, every actually had such an extreme clique in highschool?
2/14/2006 c4 midnight-kisses
love your story so far, the plot's great! some of those embrassing moments seem a little familiar for me =) good old chemistry
2/5/2006 c4 4Ck90
Sounds like Scotts has some competition.
2/4/2006 c4 alquastear
Butterfly-touch, this is absolutely a great story. I can't wait for the next chapter. To me the plot reminds me of the movie "Prince and Me". I know you might have not copied the story but its very vaguely similar. But anyway, its still a great story. I have some grammatical errors you should fix. The word "principle" and "principal" have been mixed up in your text. Principal means the head of the school while principle is rule of personal conduct. Hehe, I kind of pinpointed that out and sorry to have told you this, I know you would have known it. Its just I'm a grammer freak .
1/19/2006 c3 4Just-A-Little-Bit-Lost
That asshole. I hate guys who think their so special. What a LOSER! Poor Angee, what a horrible life. It just goes to show you that guys can be total JERKS! Great story, please write more.
1/12/2006 c3 7Vaudeville
I don’t know why but when I read Daniel’s father’s name, King Arthur, I laughed for about an hour. I actually think I should go back and read the first chapter again because I think I missed a lot. Now, I’m gonna take a wild guess and say that Standania’s not a real place. Yes? And I’m definitely not saying that cause I looked it up on a map. I searched it on Google. Yes, I am cool like that. And then I reached the end and you said it was fake. I was excited. Sorry if this review is stupid I just spent a bus ride home calling for Tom but, apparently, there is no Tom on my bus. I lurve what you have so far. I can’t wait until you write more. And I heart Daniel only cause he has boyish charm though. ‘Cause that’s cute. Keep 'er going.

k-cigs; P.s. This is the longest review I've ever written, so you should feel special. And thanks for your review.
1/11/2006 c3 JH01
Hey, your story is awesome. Really interesting!Please update soon^-^
1/11/2006 c1 2apocalypse09
"Servants and butlers scurried around afraid of the wrath of their king in his present mood." You need a comma after "around". Just a quick little note. Nice job :)
1/10/2006 c3 6Raven of Ice
1/10/2006 c3 dOrKy-GuRl03
hahaha well see...they might like each other but just too dumb to notice it...just kidding...well keep updating girl..so loving it...well can't wait the next chapter to post soon...well gotta go now...so peace out then...
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