for did you m i s s me ?5/6/2006 c1 the naked civil servant
missed me missed me, now you have kiss me if you KISS me, MISter, that must mean you love me, if you Love me, mister, you must want to fuck me, if you fuck me mister, you must think i'm pretty do you think so mister? please?
if you missed me, mister
why do you keep leaving
missed me missed me, now you have kiss me if you KISS me, MISter, that must mean you love me, if you Love me, mister, you must want to fuck me, if you fuck me mister, you must think i'm pretty do you think so mister? please?
if you missed me, mister
why do you keep leaving
4/30/2006 c1 
23simpletragedy
i liked how you made me think it was just another love poem...but then at the end, he threw her away. great job!
23simpletragedyi liked how you made me think it was just another love poem...but then at the end, he threw her away. great job!
3/11/2006 c1 11les petits bateaux
So painful. Your endings are just amazing; it's really beautiful, and how angst can turn something into pure beauty is wowing. The ending was very good and impactful. :)
11les petits bateauxSo painful. Your endings are just amazing; it's really beautiful, and how angst can turn something into pure beauty is wowing. The ending was very good and impactful. :)
1/12/2006 c1 13Nicole Michele
You capture her hope and pain in this poem without ever describing what her reaction was. You packed a powerful emotional punch into this one and I loved it.
13Nicole MicheleYou capture her hope and pain in this poem without ever describing what her reaction was. You packed a powerful emotional punch into this one and I loved it.
1/12/2006 c1 81thursdays and rain
ooh.. nice & creepy.. beautifully written.. (i only heard eisley once & i think they're really good)
81thursdays and rainooh.. nice & creepy.. beautifully written.. (i only heard eisley once & i think they're really good)
1/11/2006 c1 4LovingTarquine
This is good. I like it. It's short, but narrative. Tells a sad story and yet a common occurence.
8/10
4LovingTarquineThis is good. I like it. It's short, but narrative. Tells a sad story and yet a common occurence.
8/10
1/11/2006 c1 8AstayrFoxx
Wow and you say I have a strong ending. I loved reading this keep up the work ^^.
8AstayrFoxxWow and you say I have a strong ending. I loved reading this keep up the work ^^.
1/11/2006 c1 11primal injection
its like a nightmare i once had. although we know he's gona say "no" it dosnt take away any of the hurt that comes across so painfully well in this poem. thanks...
11primal injectionits like a nightmare i once had. although we know he's gona say "no" it dosnt take away any of the hurt that comes across so painfully well in this poem. thanks...
1/11/2006 c1 18Tikklz
Ugh, it's a tie between this poem and "And Yet". One line after the other kept complimenting the one before it so, so well that it was astounding. The flow was great. This poem seemed to capture the love they had, the betrayal upon the kiss with the "other", and the hurt when he answers her. But, I do agree that the last 'no' would be better left off. We know what he's going to say with 'he doesn't know what to say/and she knows now, and she doesn't know what to say'. Besides that, this poem was perfect! Welcome to my fav. author's list!
18TikklzUgh, it's a tie between this poem and "And Yet". One line after the other kept complimenting the one before it so, so well that it was astounding. The flow was great. This poem seemed to capture the love they had, the betrayal upon the kiss with the "other", and the hurt when he answers her. But, I do agree that the last 'no' would be better left off. We know what he's going to say with 'he doesn't know what to say/and she knows now, and she doesn't know what to say'. Besides that, this poem was perfect! Welcome to my fav. author's list!
1/10/2006 c1 10notACTUALLYwriting
I think that believe it or not, it would be better without the last line, "'no'". "and with a cold dagger on his tongue, he responds." And end it there. The no is implied, so we don't really need it.
10notACTUALLYwritingI think that believe it or not, it would be better without the last line, "'no'". "and with a cold dagger on his tongue, he responds." And end it there. The no is implied, so we don't really need it.
1/9/2006 c1 a lonely september
'his ringlets of darkened hair gleam in the light' that was such beautiful detail, i could see it perfectly, wonderful job.the ending was sofuckingsad. it made me want to cry or something. it just hurt, 'and with a cold dagger on his tongue, he responds, 'no.'' just because of all of the love portrayed in this poem before, it had such a great impact. wonderful job.
'his ringlets of darkened hair gleam in the light' that was such beautiful detail, i could see it perfectly, wonderful job.the ending was sofuckingsad. it made me want to cry or something. it just hurt, 'and with a cold dagger on his tongue, he responds, 'no.'' just because of all of the love portrayed in this poem before, it had such a great impact. wonderful job.
1/9/2006 c1 92randompoetry
Ah! No! This poem broke me heart. Wow, such powerful words, such powerful emotions. You are a powerful poet.
92randompoetryAh! No! This poem broke me heart. Wow, such powerful words, such powerful emotions. You are a powerful poet.