
8/9/2007 c1
6A different time
I really like this. It's quite cool. It sort of reminds me of a children's song, but a darker, deeper version. I thought of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star when I first read it, and it actually sounds cool if you sing the words with the tune (a bit of the theme has to be repeated to accomodate the different lengths), but that's just.. really cool to me. I really enjoyed it.
And, this is extremely extremely delayed, but I appreaciate all of your reviews on my work and I would follow your suggestions on grammatical errors, but, having so many computers at home, I'm not quite sure which each file is on, and am not quite up to looking for them. I just wanted to thank you for taking time to review, and let you know that I am acknowledging your suggestions, I'm just lazy, ;]. Thanks!

I really like this. It's quite cool. It sort of reminds me of a children's song, but a darker, deeper version. I thought of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star when I first read it, and it actually sounds cool if you sing the words with the tune (a bit of the theme has to be repeated to accomodate the different lengths), but that's just.. really cool to me. I really enjoyed it.
And, this is extremely extremely delayed, but I appreaciate all of your reviews on my work and I would follow your suggestions on grammatical errors, but, having so many computers at home, I'm not quite sure which each file is on, and am not quite up to looking for them. I just wanted to thank you for taking time to review, and let you know that I am acknowledging your suggestions, I'm just lazy, ;]. Thanks!
10/2/2006 c1 Elizabeth Bilberry
Simple and yet inspiring. I love metaphors that involve the idea of flying.
EB
Simple and yet inspiring. I love metaphors that involve the idea of flying.
EB
9/9/2006 c1
8CraigAPrice
Very well written poem, the ryhmes and such flow perfectly. I suck at poems, so I only stick to fantasy -_-, keep up the good work =)

Very well written poem, the ryhmes and such flow perfectly. I suck at poems, so I only stick to fantasy -_-, keep up the good work =)
5/18/2006 c1
124Tipped
Very sweet and simple and still very strong. I love it, especially because that's how I feel write now. Pure emotion. Ther rhyming wasn't forced, rhythm was constant, and it flowed nicely. great job :)

Very sweet and simple and still very strong. I love it, especially because that's how I feel write now. Pure emotion. Ther rhyming wasn't forced, rhythm was constant, and it flowed nicely. great job :)
5/9/2006 c1
49Neaera
Wow I can really relate to this... it reminds me of just me and Mo (mom) I guess, like... sometimes I feel like she's holding me back or "clipping my wings" which, I love that line by the way :o) Keep it up huns! Nicely done

Wow I can really relate to this... it reminds me of just me and Mo (mom) I guess, like... sometimes I feel like she's holding me back or "clipping my wings" which, I love that line by the way :o) Keep it up huns! Nicely done
4/14/2006 c1
31poemkitten7
Wow! That's so pretty and powerful. I love it! Short but indeed very sweet! ^_^ Beautifully written.

Wow! That's so pretty and powerful. I love it! Short but indeed very sweet! ^_^ Beautifully written.
4/13/2006 c1
81Princess-anna57
Good job! It's a pretty piece. Thanks for sharing, and thanks for your review! ^_^ Keep writing!
~Anna~ ^_^

Good job! It's a pretty piece. Thanks for sharing, and thanks for your review! ^_^ Keep writing!
~Anna~ ^_^
2/3/2006 c1
35Richard Pendragon
I really liked the seventh line because it encompasses everything that makes compasionate humans just that. I would like to give you critcism but i can't find any thing. good job.
Rp

I really liked the seventh line because it encompasses everything that makes compasionate humans just that. I would like to give you critcism but i can't find any thing. good job.
Rp
2/1/2006 c1
879Moondog Dozier
Your use of rhyme is excellent. This has a wonderful musical quality that enhances the theme that you've produced. Good write.

Your use of rhyme is excellent. This has a wonderful musical quality that enhances the theme that you've produced. Good write.
2/1/2006 c1
20zaide koizumi
First of all, thankyou for taking away seconds of your life just to type me a review. I appreciate the thought.
This poem is great. I myself find it hard this type of poems. It actually had, for me, a pleasant 'melody' to it. I wish I could write like you.
Keep up the good work and thanks again.

First of all, thankyou for taking away seconds of your life just to type me a review. I appreciate the thought.
This poem is great. I myself find it hard this type of poems. It actually had, for me, a pleasant 'melody' to it. I wish I could write like you.
Keep up the good work and thanks again.
2/1/2006 c1
129Hunter Brown
I loved it. great imagery. I like the "my heart, my mind, my nerves, my soul". Nice job. Oh and on mine, where you said it was kind of choppy. You were right. I did it to show defiance. good call. most people haven't picked up on that.

I loved it. great imagery. I like the "my heart, my mind, my nerves, my soul". Nice job. Oh and on mine, where you said it was kind of choppy. You were right. I did it to show defiance. good call. most people haven't picked up on that.
1/29/2006 c1
74LordK
I really liked this piece, especially the "my heart, my mind, my nerves, my soul\are vacant, let me make them whole." That's a beautiful, wonderful metaphor. The idea behind this poem is very clear, and the flow is absolutely perfect. Like, pristine. *claps*
Thanks very much for the review as well. I agree, especially about the last lines of the chorus being a bit desperate. Thank you!

I really liked this piece, especially the "my heart, my mind, my nerves, my soul\are vacant, let me make them whole." That's a beautiful, wonderful metaphor. The idea behind this poem is very clear, and the flow is absolutely perfect. Like, pristine. *claps*
Thanks very much for the review as well. I agree, especially about the last lines of the chorus being a bit desperate. Thank you!