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for spiders bees webs & c a n d l e w a x

8/3/2006 c1 61the.pink.life
Whoa. Dark. Powerful. Great images throughout, and I love the way you play with the format of the poem. It's very visually intriguing. I'm putting you on my author alerts to keep up with this interesting work. Keep writing! :)
8/1/2006 c1 107ash the arsnist
i absolutely adore the imagery in this piece, it kept me hanging on your every word, && the last three lines drove shivers down my spine, i loved it
5/6/2006 c1 61Wingless Cherub
Beautiful.
5/5/2006 c1 Queen of Absolutely Everything
you are truly a genius when it comes to the purposeful misuse of punctuation. that was flawed in such a beautiful way. brava, well done!
3/17/2006 c1 27RosepetalDoll
wow. like the passion in your writing. great stuff there.
3/4/2006 c1 79Ashes.to.Acid
Wow. I'm speechless. Words can't describe how wonderful this is..

"and i say / rip out its wings" - that is my favorite part, it sounds so..dramatic and final. Wonderful!
2/26/2006 c1 the naked civil servant
oh wow... that last line is to DIE for. beautiful metaphors and an echo that lasts for days. perfect.
2/15/2006 c1 c'mon sweet catastrophe not logged in
this is amazing. love the metaphors and wordplay!
2/10/2006 c1 90poetic abortion
[+ fav.]

seriously, this is just amazing; "the bee has fallen in the wax/i say/rip out its wings" is such a haunting way to end a piece and just...wow, some veryvery beautiful stuff before then.

you make angst something of a gift (one that isn't crappy and about "i want to die" but something beautiful and...poetic [for the lack of a better word]). loved it, loved it; this was beyond perfect for me.

~* noelle
2/4/2006 c1 ylem
last line = best part of today. i've never thought about it but i could also define someone i know with this metaphor. great great great.
1/19/2006 c1 With Rhyme and Reason
I usually like to deliver some sort of a verdict: "This poem is good" or "This poem is NOT good." Unfortunately, I can't do that in this case. I read your "poem" about ten seconds ago and I can't really remember what it was about. Why? Well, it's NOT because I have the attention span of a toenail. No. It's because of your typography.

I don't understand why people feel the need to put words into italics, bolds, extra spaces, and underlines. It takes away from your writing. Every time I almost "got into" the poem, I was hit in the face with some weird typing style, which took my mind completely away from CONTENT and made me focus on APPEARANCE-not a good thing. Your poetry should be able to stand on its own as a literary work-not as a circus of bold and italic letters.

In the end, no, I didn't like this poem. But keep in mind that, technically speaking, I hardly "read" it.
1/16/2006 c1 28always gats b y
unique concept... sparks a strange imagination. nicely written.
1/16/2006 c1 77by His blood
wow. this is fucking amazing. i sometimes use a similar format, because it makes the poem more interesting, && you certainly acheived that here. so beautiful, in a rawtwistedangst way... excellent. keep writing ; you have talent.
1/15/2006 c1 75Carp
Thank you for reviewing my work, love. :) This poem is pretty intense. Wow. Nicely done.
1/12/2006 c1 13Nicole Michele
Wow, I honestly loved that. You have talent. I love the way that you compared his words to a spider, and I thought the line "...and now there's distastful cobwebs pulling me to h i m again.." Was great. For some reason the words distasteful cobwebs was really meaningfulto me. Have to ponder that one! Anyways, I loved it and hope to hear more from you.Keep Writing!

PS. Powerful!
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