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2/16/2006 c1 101frigg
Very nice, I love the first sentence and the part about 'the glass that kissed your backed'. What a way to say it.

Cheers Junkd
1/27/2006 c1 8squiggle-line
I love the long run on sentence. Nice combination of imagery (mucky water...melting each and every coherent thought) and rambling (oh so thick skin). Minor thing: elf-shaped? Instead of elf shaped?

"But like what I am feeling..." Is the "like" necessary? Are the quotation marks around "normal" necessary as well?

I also like the ending. The one word is a nice contrast to the long sentence that opens the story. Plus, the "right" makes you're whole tone sound kind of wistful.

Nice piece.
1/26/2006 c1 a lonely september
this is so well written, wonderful job.
1/24/2006 c1 35Strangerwithnoface
Hm, it's nice, a little more of prose though, dontchya think?

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