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5/4/2006 c1 10darkmoon-angelus
Hah. A good look into the mind of the paranoid. I like it. I didn't notice any real issues with your syntax or anything, it looks good, and I like the way you don't give any real details as to the main character other than what the reader can infer from his actions and thoughts.
2/8/2006 c1 7Justin Carlton
Creepy as always, my friend. I like the progression, although there are a few verb tense errors - switching from present to past tense and things like that. Good story, though. I think you shouldn't explain that he has a phobia in the summary - let the reader think about what's wrong with the guy. Either he's committable, or he's got some sort of misanthropic attitude.

Good story! Thumbs up. Keep writing.

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