for The Confession of Ernesto3/16/2006 c1 
2CrypticIdentity
I really like this so far. Ernesto is pretty interesting to read about, and I wonder what would cause him to get into a business like "serious banking."
There are a couple of things that seem a little weird, though. For one, the woman Ernesto is talking to (Aleta) doesn't seem very perturbed by what Ernesto is telling her. If a murderer got in a seat next to me I'd be a little frightened. And it seemed like by the end of the chapter Ernesto wasn't really talking to her, but more narrating to the reader.
Still, though, I definitely think it's an interesting plot. It would be interesting to learn more about Connor and the background behind him and Ernesto. Keep it up!
-Ian
2CrypticIdentityI really like this so far. Ernesto is pretty interesting to read about, and I wonder what would cause him to get into a business like "serious banking."
There are a couple of things that seem a little weird, though. For one, the woman Ernesto is talking to (Aleta) doesn't seem very perturbed by what Ernesto is telling her. If a murderer got in a seat next to me I'd be a little frightened. And it seemed like by the end of the chapter Ernesto wasn't really talking to her, but more narrating to the reader.
Still, though, I definitely think it's an interesting plot. It would be interesting to learn more about Connor and the background behind him and Ernesto. Keep it up!
-Ian