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for Opium Angel

3/21/2006 c1 39Moppish
Really beautiful and really powerful.

I don't think you need the line "That digs a hole in her vein." It kind of explains too much. We know what the needle is doing.

When you said "shit hole" it really broke the mood. Like yeah, shit is a really powerful word and seems to express how horrible it is, but find something else, cause it completely does not belong with the rest of your words.

Your best bits are: "eyes ooze sticky glue," "drown out the soft nightmare," and "heartbreak of her skin." And I love the title.

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