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for I Am The Only

9/15/2009 c1 JessicaJ
This was an interesting read. Its a shame there isn't more of it.

I am interested to know how they got together. That's the most interesting part of it, is it not?
5/5/2006 c1 2Lady Aeden
Thanks for reviewing my story. Although, this isn't my kind of story either, I really enjoyed the way you wrote the story. You did a great job setting up the mood, and your writing style is easy to read. The only constructive criticism I can think of is giving a little description of the dorm room. But all in all, this is a good opening for the morning after (which is where you're going, right?)
3/29/2006 c1 mwegan
Hi! Well I have the time to read and form an opinion...although it's not really my kind of story...

Some of the sentences seem very long, especially at the beginning. Is that intentional? Anyway, some of them were a bit confusing, which may be also intentional, I suppose. Other than that it is well written. The reader gets drawn into the main character's state of mind, which seems to be obsessive and clingy.

I hope this is helpful, but like I said, not my kind of story...
3/26/2006 c1 3thelittletree
I liked this a lot. I know you're looking for criticism but, except for one tiny, itty-bitty thing ('When he woke up I’m make love to him') there was nothing in this I would want to see changed. I love the mood, the light tone of her obsession - the first paragraph particularly drew me in - the real-unreality of it all. I was in bed with my boyfriend the night the millenium mumbled and rolled over in its sleep. I remember we were making out, we'd only been making out for a little while, and it was all exciting and scary and new...much more so than the threat of crashing planes and computers, somehow.

I hope whatever you're writing this for has a long, productive season and gets to where you want it to go! And...if you happen to post anything else on this site, I'll happily read it.
3/25/2006 c1 1Nicole Alexander
so beautiful! michael seems like a wonderful guy!

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