for Radiance of Eternity9/30/2006 c1 
16Theory Of The 4th Dimension
Enjoyed the rhythm, I suppose it's the tinest stones that build the strongest castles, or at last that's the metaphor which I think suits this.
I liked the twist in emotions to this, from standing on a pedestal the writer quickly shifts to feelings of regret and sorrow...but still very hopeful for th future. Very good poem!
16Theory Of The 4th DimensionEnjoyed the rhythm, I suppose it's the tinest stones that build the strongest castles, or at last that's the metaphor which I think suits this.
I liked the twist in emotions to this, from standing on a pedestal the writer quickly shifts to feelings of regret and sorrow...but still very hopeful for th future. Very good poem!
4/1/2006 c1 15Kella Trams
Haha! This poem is so cool! I looked at it and went WOAH someone needs to use stanzas, but as I read it I understand why it was all lumped together. Stick with your choice.
I HEART YOUR RHYME SCHEME. Geez. You have a wonderful ability of stretching the rhyme scheme without making it seem forced. instead it's the opposite. It's very subtle and you hardly notice it but when you do it's amazing! Your phrases flow together very well, as they should. Your summaries of minutes and hours, etc, are astonishing. In just those few words you manage to cram all the diction, tone, imagery, and style needed to portray the meaning of a minute or an hour. The second half needs some more punctuation, periods and such, because otherwise it reads as one big sentence or something and that's a tad confusing. I love the tone of the second half. So optimistic and easy going!
This poem reads like Shakespeare. Well done.
15Kella TramsHaha! This poem is so cool! I looked at it and went WOAH someone needs to use stanzas, but as I read it I understand why it was all lumped together. Stick with your choice.
I HEART YOUR RHYME SCHEME. Geez. You have a wonderful ability of stretching the rhyme scheme without making it seem forced. instead it's the opposite. It's very subtle and you hardly notice it but when you do it's amazing! Your phrases flow together very well, as they should. Your summaries of minutes and hours, etc, are astonishing. In just those few words you manage to cram all the diction, tone, imagery, and style needed to portray the meaning of a minute or an hour. The second half needs some more punctuation, periods and such, because otherwise it reads as one big sentence or something and that's a tad confusing. I love the tone of the second half. So optimistic and easy going!
This poem reads like Shakespeare. Well done.