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for I Do Cry

5/31/2006 c1 168Wylloa
this is beautiful and touching. I like how you describe sorrow, not in anger but in saddness, something that I have to learn. My favorite lines were"So I pass the flowers ‘long the waves"and"To wallow in depressions caveAnd renounce my pain again"those two lines mean so much. I like the language you used also. Good Luck with the magazine entrance!
5/13/2006 c1 100sereneXOangel
i think that this piece is so true. you describe the feelings in this poem so well that anyone can relate to it. there's not one line that isn't eloquent. the imagery gave so much to the mind and it would be a great idea to submit this to a magazine. it is too good not to be read.
5/5/2006 c1 korashio
Wow, omg this was so deep. You did an excellent job. I totally get the feeling you were trying to put out.
4/14/2006 c1 858Anna178
Well, it was good before you changed it. Actually I think I liked it better before, not to offend you. Anyway, it'll take up a whole page in the magazine if you do use it. AND YOU SHOULD! IT'S GOOD, I just have a fondnes for the old one, probably because of my stubborness.

ANNA
4/14/2006 c1 7epiphanydawning
I thought it was rather good. I loved the rhythm of the beginning and middle. The end, though it had beautiful metaphors and good word choice, I thought was a little strange because of it not rhyming like the rest. But all in all I thought it was great. You might not want to listen to me though because I'm just a beginning poet. I just think I know alot because my sister has been writing for years. :) Arrogant am I.
4/13/2006 c1 estranged3322
"And renounce my pain again

Would do to him no greater serves

Than to me a flying ilk" its "Service" not serves. good job

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