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for The Seventh Guard

5/20/2006 c1 33LightfootLee
You write in a way that, within the first few sentences can submerge the reader into whatever world you wish. I enjoyed how at the battle of En Kelsar both armies just sat and watched as the mage's battled. kinda reminiscent of parts of WWI huh. I'll definatley have to check out your other stories as well.
4/29/2006 c1 11Wolfie Star26
I should have read this sooner...but like you I have way to much stuff to do and never read anything when it's first updated or uploaded. That's sort of a hint for you. But of course I'm sure I can wait for your exams to finished before you read ch. 6 of D&M.

-Cough- I need to stop ranting, it's not good for me or for anyone else.

"Ejnar, Sergeant Major and occasional brevetted Captain, stood just outside the gates of Kir Teldran, leaning on his spear with an expression usually reserved for those about to be hung."

That was awesome, it really gets someone into the story. Even though it is the third paragraph type thingy.

"Ejnar joined the army at fifteen, marching to the borders to protect a country he didn’t particularly care about."

You have no idea how much that made me laugh.

"“Ejnar! You’d best not be lying to my wife about me!”"

So he's not gone. That's a relieve, but there would also be no story if he had not returned.

Great work as usual. It's hard to say something of your is bad, because it never is bad. Keep up the wonderful work and before I somehow work a 'update soon' in this review for a one-shot i need to find caffine.
4/19/2006 c1 6Count of Casualty
Oh, interesting! Very good writing. I'm not sure I completely understood this, maybe I'll have to read more of your work? I like Dorell best as a character in this for some reason.

Anyway, one thing bothered me...

“'Of course I will.' He pretended to consider." Take out the period and make the "he" lower cased.

“Of course I will,” he pretended to consider.

Like that. Yep. Awesome story! I'll have to check out more of your work. :)
4/19/2006 c1 2Casey Drake
*nod* i like. So i take it the Ayinha and the Chirrum finally made peace? To create Ayinchirr?

ANYway... I LOVED the twist.


:) CD
4/18/2006 c1 StoryJunkie
the names of places and people were imaginative and poetic, but i pretty much just scanned over them, except for Selene, Ejner and dorrell. I kind of got mixed up when he was lost in the city, but it kind of made sense at the end. (light bulb "on" over head) I kept imagining Ejnar as this heavily muscled guy that was dumb and strong, about 250 lbs and sandy haired with a braid down his back. Even though you didn't describe him at all. weird, huh?

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