for Covet9/17/2011 c5 
2akaCHEEKS
It is so hard to read this story without being biased. I remember reading the first version and it's completely different. For a minute there I forgot that her original name as Adrienne and her nickname was Addie and not Adee. Or maybe it is the same nickname?
I feel like the story has completely been decimated! What happened to the romance? The intense, fiery love story that these two created? I understand that you're on a word limit what with you cutting off the beginning where they were children playing pretend Queen and she fell down that hole where Lucas saved her and said that it might be the tunnel that the soldiers of the old times dug.
That was one of the cute parts and a good beginning to this story, nonetheless, it was possible to cut that scene off since you can just recount it through one of the characters saying that story instead of actually living the scene. Get me?
But another memorable scene was their wedding night and it's totally been cut off! Again, I understand that you are under a word count and maybe one of the publishers/agent that you were talking to suggest that you take some stuff out. But that part made this story unique from other stories like it (other historical romance ones)
It was very memorable. I don't know. I'm really trying to read this story from a new set of eyes but it's just really hard. There are times when I can't get the imagery that you're explaining simply because there are just not enough details and I just have to rely on the implications select characters give to try and connect the dots and figure out what's going on. (Ex. when Adee's mom slapped her after she came home w/ traces of Lucas' kisses on her neck and stuff)
That scene was really hard to picture simply because there just was not enough descriptive imagery to help my creativity think of the scene in my head. Yeah, I'm rambling.
I wasn't even expecting to remember this story but as I was reading it, memories were bombarding me and I was remembering what happened int his scene and oh that scene or hey she removed this description. And yeah, I'm a little disappointed. But i will try to read this story from a new perspective (as if I've never read it before and not judge it based on what I knew previously) but it will be hard and I will complain that I don't quite like it.
Can't wait till you give us another chapter of this story or when it finally hits the bookshelves. If the agents/publishers don't want to help you get this book on the market, then do it yourself. I will happily buy a copy!
2akaCHEEKSIt is so hard to read this story without being biased. I remember reading the first version and it's completely different. For a minute there I forgot that her original name as Adrienne and her nickname was Addie and not Adee. Or maybe it is the same nickname?
I feel like the story has completely been decimated! What happened to the romance? The intense, fiery love story that these two created? I understand that you're on a word limit what with you cutting off the beginning where they were children playing pretend Queen and she fell down that hole where Lucas saved her and said that it might be the tunnel that the soldiers of the old times dug.
That was one of the cute parts and a good beginning to this story, nonetheless, it was possible to cut that scene off since you can just recount it through one of the characters saying that story instead of actually living the scene. Get me?
But another memorable scene was their wedding night and it's totally been cut off! Again, I understand that you are under a word count and maybe one of the publishers/agent that you were talking to suggest that you take some stuff out. But that part made this story unique from other stories like it (other historical romance ones)
It was very memorable. I don't know. I'm really trying to read this story from a new set of eyes but it's just really hard. There are times when I can't get the imagery that you're explaining simply because there are just not enough details and I just have to rely on the implications select characters give to try and connect the dots and figure out what's going on. (Ex. when Adee's mom slapped her after she came home w/ traces of Lucas' kisses on her neck and stuff)
That scene was really hard to picture simply because there just was not enough descriptive imagery to help my creativity think of the scene in my head. Yeah, I'm rambling.
I wasn't even expecting to remember this story but as I was reading it, memories were bombarding me and I was remembering what happened int his scene and oh that scene or hey she removed this description. And yeah, I'm a little disappointed. But i will try to read this story from a new perspective (as if I've never read it before and not judge it based on what I knew previously) but it will be hard and I will complain that I don't quite like it.
Can't wait till you give us another chapter of this story or when it finally hits the bookshelves. If the agents/publishers don't want to help you get this book on the market, then do it yourself. I will happily buy a copy!
4/23/2011 c1 4Mary Chrys
Oh man, is this going where I think it's going?
Because the David and Bathsheba story has always upset me, as impersonal as it is, and if that happens to Lucas and Adelais, I will actually cry. I like Damien a lot, but gah, save Lucas and Adelais!
Anyway, sorry, what I really meant to say was that I absolutely adore your writing based on what I've seen in this story, and I really, really hope that I get a chance to read the rest of it! I'll alert just in case you put up an author's note saying it's been published. (=
4Mary ChrysOh man, is this going where I think it's going?
Because the David and Bathsheba story has always upset me, as impersonal as it is, and if that happens to Lucas and Adelais, I will actually cry. I like Damien a lot, but gah, save Lucas and Adelais!
Anyway, sorry, what I really meant to say was that I absolutely adore your writing based on what I've seen in this story, and I really, really hope that I get a chance to read the rest of it! I'll alert just in case you put up an author's note saying it's been published. (=
2/26/2011 c1 Eccthlacine
Excellent work, I really wish I could read more of it. When you do get it published, be sure to let everyone know! ;)
Excellent work, I really wish I could read more of it. When you do get it published, be sure to let everyone know! ;)
1/28/2011 c1 sneaky-fox
I don't understand, where is the rest of the story? I've read it before and I loved it but I'm pretty sure there were more chapters...
I don't understand, where is the rest of the story? I've read it before and I loved it but I'm pretty sure there were more chapters...
1/2/2011 c7 xoxokristen
I love this story! When you get this published please let us know so I can go buy the book!
I love this story! When you get this published please let us know so I can go buy the book!
12/24/2010 c7 JustLikeMe91
Hello! I was just wondering how the editing and getting published process was going for you :) Especially with the end of medical school and all.
Hello! I was just wondering how the editing and getting published process was going for you :) Especially with the end of medical school and all.
12/16/2010 c7 1Luvtru
That was AMAZING! You're such a talented writer and I love the fact that you kept them apart til their wedding night; it made it so much more sweet. Because of you, that's EXACTLY how my wedding night's gonna be. Beautiful writing.
1LuvtruThat was AMAZING! You're such a talented writer and I love the fact that you kept them apart til their wedding night; it made it so much more sweet. Because of you, that's EXACTLY how my wedding night's gonna be. Beautiful writing.
12/12/2010 c7 4BS2007
I finally read all of these chapters. I thought the story was amazing and I hope that I will be able to read your novel one day soon!
Great job and don't ever give up!
~BS~
4BS2007I finally read all of these chapters. I thought the story was amazing and I hope that I will be able to read your novel one day soon!
Great job and don't ever give up!
~BS~
10/4/2010 c4 7CaveDwellers
Maybe you were trying not to keep the story from moving too quickly, but I think that it is a bit redundant to have the scene with Dinah and Hugues reminiscing, and then to have Dinah explain the story to Adrienne. I have the same problem myself, which is probably why I caught this. It's especially a problem for me when I love the scenes that are causing the redundancy. ;P
Otherwise, Adrienne and Lucas have great chemistry. I can totally relate to the attraction you describe. The writing also has good flow, and a nice blend of "olde" and colloquial English. I read the summary on your profile, and I'm interested to see where this story goes, even if it is only until the 7th chapter. :)
'til next,
CD 1.0
7CaveDwellersMaybe you were trying not to keep the story from moving too quickly, but I think that it is a bit redundant to have the scene with Dinah and Hugues reminiscing, and then to have Dinah explain the story to Adrienne. I have the same problem myself, which is probably why I caught this. It's especially a problem for me when I love the scenes that are causing the redundancy. ;P
Otherwise, Adrienne and Lucas have great chemistry. I can totally relate to the attraction you describe. The writing also has good flow, and a nice blend of "olde" and colloquial English. I read the summary on your profile, and I'm interested to see where this story goes, even if it is only until the 7th chapter. :)
'til next,
CD 1.0
9/23/2010 c7 5Disney Is Hardcore
Goshdarnit!
Maybe I should pay attention when people say they're not posting the complete story... ;_;
5Disney Is HardcoreGoshdarnit!
Maybe I should pay attention when people say they're not posting the complete story... ;_;
9/16/2010 c7 laramara
aw reading that made me remember how much I love those two. I'm all teary already. Wow I'm pathetic. I really really hope you succeed at getting it published!
aw reading that made me remember how much I love those two. I'm all teary already. Wow I'm pathetic. I really really hope you succeed at getting it published!
9/1/2010 c7 Genato
DAMN IT. LUCAS IS URIAH? DAMN DAMN DAMN. :)) Alert me if your book is ever available in the Philippines. :) or maybe in the US. :)
DAMN IT. LUCAS IS URIAH? DAMN DAMN DAMN. :)) Alert me if your book is ever available in the Philippines. :) or maybe in the US. :)
8/26/2010 c7 MistressBlack852
Hi! I read this story a long long time ago and thought it was excellently written :)
I hope you are able to get it published and let me know if it does! It'd definitely buy a copy ^^
Hi! I read this story a long long time ago and thought it was excellently written :)
I hope you are able to get it published and let me know if it does! It'd definitely buy a copy ^^