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7/2/2006 c1 7Eleyn
This is a very interesting start. I'm guessing you're going to write more? Another chapter, perhaps? You definitely should. It's an interesting premise. What could be on her back? A rash? Wings? Who knows? I would just look over for grammatical errors, like run-on sentences and agreements. Be on the lookout for using a word too often, like "doggedly" and "dog." I think you know where I mean. Keep writing! This will be great!
7/2/2006 c1 18Serious Sonneteer
Short and skimpy.
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