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for watch the sky

6/19/2008 c1 495mate.feed.kill.repeat
Not to like dampen this or anything, but you think writing a poem in another SPOKEN language is easy? Try doing it in American Sign Language. =]

Okay. Yeah. A poem in any language is difficult. French is a pretty language. But watching poetry... in ASL... simply beautiful. I can't wait to start ASL I this fall.

I liked this one, too. I think I just realized that I haven't read all your poetry yet. So I'm trying to work through it. This one was really pretty, even in English without the rhythm it had in French.


And yeah, I guess if you REALLY want to, you can refer to me by my birthname. Danielle.
1/30/2007 c1 the naked civil servant
ha! i admire you greatly for writing poetry in french. it is obscenely difficult but it often sounds pleasing :P

hate to do this but "orange" should be "orage" & (l'avenir et ne plus regarder) might flow better. also "reverberer" is like the verb but to be honest i think you'd be better with just "reflets" here.

gorgeous poem! i know it sounds anal to correct you but i really do think it's pretty
10/31/2006 c1 32finally-defeated
shriek. was this always named this...!

watch the sky

if it has to have an ending, maybe sometimes, it can be a happy one.

for me.

cuz im special

and i think you are too.
8/31/2006 c1 min
mm, nice (: i'd be fucked over with this project if i ever had one. garh. but ye, last few lines reminded me of something corporate's lyrics: somedays all i do is watch the sky.
8/26/2006 c1 hey maria
This is very beautiful. I'm stunned at the clarity of this poem and the delicate imagery you weaved through it. The girl seems almost childish - playing hide and seek with the storm - but of course she isn't. She's no stranger to heartbreak. And the speaker of the poem is both mysterious and omnicient, kind of godly in a way. It's incredible how much characterization and detail you created in such a short poem. I really loved it.

I also deeply admire you for being able to write poetry in French. Learning the language is hard enough, but being able to have such a good grasp on it that you can write beautiful poetry with it. . . that's very remarkable. I could only understand bits and pieces of the French version, but I look forward to the day I'll be able to read it and understand it completely.
8/18/2006 c1 Atelophobia
Ah this is nice, I am studying for my French controle which I am sure to fail & I find a French poem. Fortunately, I understood most of it, though I did cheat a few times and read the translation.

It's amazing, by the way, even more so that it's in French. I love the French version more, too, things like the break in "chez/lui." are so much more effective than "his/home.", plus French is just so much prettier overall. (:
8/13/2006 c1 87Chaos Apple
This is beautiful, and perfect, and I'm just amazed. This...how can you be such a good writer-in /another/ language? You're so incredibly talented!
8/2/2006 c1 64realityescapesher
this is gorgeous. especially the french version. i love the way the ending sounds in french. "personne n'est là." it's such a pretty language.
7/27/2006 c1 toxic-noodle725
im guessin that was the translation of the french one...yes i know, im captian obvious, nice to meet u. anyway i really like this poem. its beautifully filled w/emotion and i loved the descriptions. my fav. was the last line"nobody is there". loved it loved it! great job!
7/22/2006 c1 144chaos called creation
now i wish my french was a bit better than terrible.

if you run through it quickly it seems almost innocent, as if it was in a little girl's point of view with the simple wording, but it's not. love the quiet tone in this.
7/21/2006 c1 1Reina Starr
Beautiful... This is a great poem! Keep it up!
7/19/2006 c1 18ShadesofBlue69
wow, very awesome, i like this. yes the french version is delicious, but so is the english. very cool indeed. *favorites*~Jared
7/17/2006 c1 bread and circuses
Beautiful. I love the images this gives me. It's amazing to me that it flows so well in both languages. Truly excellent writing.
7/11/2006 c1 WhyCannotIdeleteaFPAccount
Wow, that was really really really good. Of course I couldn't understand the French, because I don't don't speak French, but the English translation was really good. I don't know if the French version sounds prettier because I don't know which letters would be silent and whatnot, but I think the English one was (in my opinion). Keep writing, this was awesome!
7/10/2006 c1 31Leaving Here
i love it. wonderful.~Liz
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