for Requiem of An Angel7/6/2006 c1 Miss. Paradox
Wow! That has some beautiful description in it. I cant really find anything wrong with it. It all sounds so wonderful.
Wow! That has some beautiful description in it. I cant really find anything wrong with it. It all sounds so wonderful.
7/6/2006 c1 Arcadia Lynch
This is a very a haunting piece. It's distorted and beautiful at the same time. You've got a unique command of language. The only thing that served to bother me was that it was so short. Also, your paragaphs are short and choppy it's not pleasing to the eye.
This is a very a haunting piece. It's distorted and beautiful at the same time. You've got a unique command of language. The only thing that served to bother me was that it was so short. Also, your paragaphs are short and choppy it's not pleasing to the eye.
7/6/2006 c1 
4ParadoxGirl
Uwah, it's beautiful. It really is beautiful. My one concern is that you seem to have each sentance in the begining as a paragraph each, it's okay to have them grouped together okay? Sometimes it works better than having them all individual and stuff.
But it is truely very nice. I like it a lot. Is it a chaptered piece or a one shot?
Morana.
4ParadoxGirlUwah, it's beautiful. It really is beautiful. My one concern is that you seem to have each sentance in the begining as a paragraph each, it's okay to have them grouped together okay? Sometimes it works better than having them all individual and stuff.
But it is truely very nice. I like it a lot. Is it a chaptered piece or a one shot?
Morana.
7/6/2006 c1 brittney
WOW!once again meghan u have amazed me with your writting abilities. The only thing I would change is that you should write more happy pieces. But other than that i think that you have great talent for this, and i hope that you continue to utilize it.
WOW!once again meghan u have amazed me with your writting abilities. The only thing I would change is that you should write more happy pieces. But other than that i think that you have great talent for this, and i hope that you continue to utilize it.
7/6/2006 c1 naughtpunk
Wow. This is awesome. You should seriously publish a book or something. It sort of reminds me of this movie I saw once, only, you know, a poem.
Wow. This is awesome. You should seriously publish a book or something. It sort of reminds me of this movie I saw once, only, you know, a poem.
7/5/2006 c1 Blehk
"dragging the dead weight of trophy wings." - Oh, you're brilliant.
I'd copy and paste everything else that really got to me, but that would take quite a while. ;)
This is excellent. As I've said, I love lyrical, fantastic, original descriptions. This flowed beautifully, and I only have one thing to say about it.
The paragraphs. There are none.
But other than that, this was just...simply elegant. Completely original, and darkly tantalizing, in a realm that is very much your own. Excellent.
Favorite Authors List.
"dragging the dead weight of trophy wings." - Oh, you're brilliant.
I'd copy and paste everything else that really got to me, but that would take quite a while. ;)
This is excellent. As I've said, I love lyrical, fantastic, original descriptions. This flowed beautifully, and I only have one thing to say about it.
The paragraphs. There are none.
But other than that, this was just...simply elegant. Completely original, and darkly tantalizing, in a realm that is very much your own. Excellent.
Favorite Authors List.
7/5/2006 c1 2Nandra
This was really good! Your writing is excellent... and you used your skills to create a very haunting piece. Well done!
2NandraThis was really good! Your writing is excellent... and you used your skills to create a very haunting piece. Well done!
7/5/2006 c1 humaninsanity from neopets
Wow, I liked this piece. Your descriptions were good, and the work was altogether haunting.
"Nor does she realize her image of purity is deformed. She drags along a glorious bat wing that reaches to far more places than the one made of beauty."
Those lines in particular I thought were good, as well as
"When will she understand she is forgotten?"
Wow, I liked this piece. Your descriptions were good, and the work was altogether haunting.
"Nor does she realize her image of purity is deformed. She drags along a glorious bat wing that reaches to far more places than the one made of beauty."
Those lines in particular I thought were good, as well as
"When will she understand she is forgotten?"