for freak storm11/28/2008 c1 
5quicktart
I loved this one! It was so touching. I could see what was happening as you said them, and I could she a mother and daughter remembering a lost father. This is going into my favorites!
~Rébecca
5quicktartI loved this one! It was so touching. I could see what was happening as you said them, and I could she a mother and daughter remembering a lost father. This is going into my favorites!
~Rébecca
7/18/2006 c1 steev
Vague, meaningless, & utterly disinteresting & worthless to a reader.
Come on,- "memories of last September" & "he died"; "he" being who? Who is "she"? What memories? What's the relevance of September?
The dialogue is unrealistic, esp. since you provide no justification for "she" to phrase such a statement so oddly.
Vague, meaningless, & utterly disinteresting & worthless to a reader.
Come on,- "memories of last September" & "he died"; "he" being who? Who is "she"? What memories? What's the relevance of September?
The dialogue is unrealistic, esp. since you provide no justification for "she" to phrase such a statement so oddly.
7/18/2006 c1 234The Moribund Marionette
AMAZING! It says SO much with so few words. A favorite, hands down. Incredible.
234The Moribund MarionetteAMAZING! It says SO much with so few words. A favorite, hands down. Incredible.