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for Running from Anger

10/11/2006 c1 67Lost In Context
This is great. I especially like the first stanza- I admire the rhyme. (I can never do it.) I can't really explain why I liek this, but I do. It's awesome.

(P.S. Thanks so much for the review, and the critique. I appreciate it.)
8/2/2006 c1 82Isabella22
I like this. It's nice just to let all your feelings trickle away.

Good job!
7/30/2006 c1 Freed by Mercy
Turn to anticipated nothingness

The above line disrupts the rhythm of your poem because it has too many syllables.Try something simpler such as :"Fade to nothing" or "vaporize from my mind".

Your final line is a little weak.

With a couple of line changes, this poem will work. It's almost there.
7/28/2006 c1 43je suis une pomme du terre
I like this a lot ^.^ I like how it's kinda rhyming kinda not... you've got talent! Oh... and...


~Lovies!~Midnight Star~
7/27/2006 c1 breathinpoetryromancelife
breathtaking, as always. fabulous.
7/27/2006 c1 31Dr-Pepper-2008
Great Poem brit!
7/27/2006 c1 10notACTUALLYwriting
... I like the rhymes. They aren't QUITE rhymes, all of them. that's why I like them.

This was a little bit, um, emo. For my taste. "Pain", I'm sorry to say, has been stolen by all emo poets. So, put simply, most writers can't really put "pain" anywhere in their writing without people's emo alerts going off.

However, "tears, scars, and you" is a lovely line. I like the comma after "scars".

"Just me and the wind" is a great line, too... I'd steal it if that wasn't completely illegal.

But anyway. "wind" and "comprehend" is a nice rhyme because it doesn't quite rhyme. I like those. Half rhymes. You hear them in songs all the time. It sounds less Mother Goose-ey.

Peace and love.


P.S. Chicken Tenders.
7/27/2006 c1 17incandescent.smiles
hey britney!

Guess what! This was really good. Really good.

So naturally, I love it!

At first when you said "thank you leila" I was just like 'what the heck?', because I couldn't remember anything I'd helped you with recently. But it makes more sense now. :). and yes, running is a great stress reliever, as are writing, punching things, screaming into pillows, watching movies that make you want to cry, dancing, and listening to VERY angry music.

Okay, so WHY do I love this? Well here goes: the ENTIRE poem was good. All of it! I especially liked the first two lines- 'hit' and 'break' really brought them together. Also, the second line in the second stanza stood out to me... I'm not sure why, but it did. It seemed to impact the reader wiht the reson of running more than the 'death and rescue' did. Maybe because the first line in that stanza didn't have *exactly* the right rhythm.

I like the ending- you still don't understand, but at least you're trying.

Love it.

Talk to you later, hon.

Love you, miss you, GET YOUR CAMERA FIXED! :P

7/26/2006 c1 Eloquent-Marionette
YAY! Britney posted! (*jumps up and down on bed*) this is great! i LOVED this poem...yeah, runnings a great stress reliever but i'm way too lazy to run. writing poems is easier. lol. anywho, my favorite stanza was "feet hit the ground/ my heart ready to break/all the shock and pain/ how much more can i take?" I LOVED IT! So full of emotion! (*huggles*) I miss ya tons brit! (*haven't heard from ya in a while*) (*hint, hint*) lol...thats okay, i know your still alive cuz you just posted this great poem! Keep writing brit! can't wait for the next one! Luv ya and miss ya more than my mind! ttyl!

luv always,~Davida
7/25/2006 c1 115Random-Idiocity
Actually, I think this poem is really good. I especially like the first 2 lines. You finally beat me with having more poems. Keep it Up!

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