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for she

6/21/2011 c1 228punctured.lungs
I love the first stanza. Well, I love all of it. I just think that the first stanza is particularly incredible.
4/20/2009 c1 145young and the reckless
"she's the pressure of your foot on the gas pedal"

stunning, to say the least
10/26/2008 c1 23the.mad.hatter's.accomplice
i'd say "good" but it's much better than that, and i'd think it was silly, to use such a...prosaic word for such a completely un-mundane piece.
6/6/2008 c1 40HurtMe
It looks like you wrote this a long time ago, so I don't know if you still use this account, but this poem was too good not to review. This piece is absolutely beautiful. It is so well written that it makes me shiver. Superbly done.
3/10/2007 c1 she smolders
she makes me wish that i could just give her a hug. this is lovely.
8/28/2006 c1 12Panicking With Hesitation
wow thats really good.

-totally love your username.

-im always wondered what: Fin means. and im been writing for three years now... thats sad.

-keep writing.
8/23/2006 c1 87Chaos Apple
God, this caught me and hel me and -it wouldn't let go- this is painful and addicting and perfect.
8/21/2006 c1 30Shes Never Known Happy
this was really good it reminded me of the writer frachsca la block lol i hope i spelt the right anyways good work
8/19/2006 c1 46ClassicElfRyoko
all I can say is *wow*! This poem made my jaw drop. I loved the last lines especially. wonderful!
8/15/2006 c1 190apromptedpoet
Absolutely gorgeous.It's addicting and sexy, just like "she". Great work.Much Love-Suicidal_Greeting
8/10/2006 c1 871no.peace.los.angeles
Beautiful and sexy. I love love love that first stanza. If that alone was the entirety of the poem, I would for sure be putting this on my favorites. However, I felt that the rest of the poem fell a little from that point, from that great opening line of "she's an anorexic's rib cage." Shut up, that's fantastic. I like how you've used metaphors throughout, but the images weren't as strong as the first stanza to me. I think the phrase "lips like sugar" is a little cliche (though I've used it before, too), though you do counteract that with the next line about vodka-spiked orange juice (you could even say "tinged with the taste of screwdrivers" there and it might work...assuming that people know that by screwdriver, you're referring to the drink and not the tool). Anyway, that's enough rambling. This is still pretty great. Keep writing! :)
8/7/2006 c1 65Aquafied
does any not need to be saved?

i really like it though, i need a tan.
8/7/2006 c1 do not resuscitate
that last stanza. how'd you think of that? the internal rhyme and the ending. it makes the poem. so pretty.
8/7/2006 c1 90WiltingBlackRose
Oh wow, that was beautiful.

I really do love the way you phrase things. I get a lot of imagery from your poems and they are very inspirational.
8/6/2006 c1 68this is britt
I change my claim from before- you are the best writer here. it started a little slow- but, then you just, described everything so vividly and perfectly and then it just goes up in flames (in a good way, I mean.) you have so much talent in you, everytime I read something you write, I'm- literally- floored. and for the most part, it takes a lot to impress me. but the way you write. my god. CAN I BE YOU FOR ONE SECOND, PLEASE? I'm gushing. I'll stop. (sorry- it's just, you, I have to review, dammit.)
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