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9/19/2006 c1 1MyNameIsMad
Another great poem! You've got good stanzas, I'll give you that. Dramatic, well timed, and well patterned. Keep up the good work and I'll keep reviewing!

-Mad

p.s. (Urf is the name of the world my story takes place on.)
8/31/2006 c1 73fading innocence
The problem with poems describing people or things-not specific things, but things, is that, somewhere, there's always something that disproves how you describe something.

For example, The Marvelous Journey of Edward Tulane tells of a china rabbit who is loved very much by a little girl, but does not know how to truly love. When he is lost, Edward is passed through many hands, old and young, and as he does so, he learns to love.

But enough ranting. The only critism I have for this very nicely done piece is that in your last stanza, you said the china doll was "unloved". Unfortunately, that is basically untrue. Many young children love their china dolls, and china dolls are often a family heirloom or something from an adult's childhood that's very precious to them.

Wow, I'm starting to sound like that nightmare interpretation guide I just read.

Well, other than those few things, I liked the subject you picked, and the words to used to describe.

~RI

P.S. CC means "constructive critism". Which you gave.
8/31/2006 c1 bipedalcooney
Very nicely written. I like this a lot. Definately keep writing.
8/31/2006 c1 13Draven DarkCrow
I like the personification. well done.

Draven.
8/31/2006 c1 9dreamforever101
aw.. the poem is so nice!

I could totally see teh (evil ;D) china doll glaring down at me when I am crying. That's the image the poem brought me.

Good Job!

plz review back :)

-Dreamforever101

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