for Softly4/10/2007 c1 
12Kurt Wagner
I was in a relationship like this. its when i figured out that lust and love were two different things. *sigh*
I like the repitition, and the rhyming flows nicely. One thing though;
"truth that our minds can't bear" I think it might sound better if you don't use a contraction, as in "cannot" instead of "can't". Just a suggestion :)
As always, nicely done.
P.S. you changed accounts? this one seems more poetry-inclined, is that on purpose?
12Kurt WagnerI was in a relationship like this. its when i figured out that lust and love were two different things. *sigh*
I like the repitition, and the rhyming flows nicely. One thing though;
"truth that our minds can't bear" I think it might sound better if you don't use a contraction, as in "cannot" instead of "can't". Just a suggestion :)
As always, nicely done.
P.S. you changed accounts? this one seems more poetry-inclined, is that on purpose?
9/11/2006 c1 1Mosaic Stains
One word; wonderful... No, on a more serious note, it was very touching and exactly what you named it. Especially for the 'whisper softly in the air' and 'kiss my lips so tenderly'.
1Mosaic StainsOne word; wonderful... No, on a more serious note, it was very touching and exactly what you named it. Especially for the 'whisper softly in the air' and 'kiss my lips so tenderly'.
9/7/2006 c1 91son of frost
Well written, the writing was dark and seductive, it's always interesting to read that sort of writing. I enjoyed the repitition of certain lines, but I felt that one or two of the rhymes were a little forced. Keep writing, and thanks for the review.
91son of frostWell written, the writing was dark and seductive, it's always interesting to read that sort of writing. I enjoyed the repitition of certain lines, but I felt that one or two of the rhymes were a little forced. Keep writing, and thanks for the review.
9/4/2006 c1 829Anaare
First of all, thank you for the many reviews. I don't really read fiction on Fictionpress (weird, huh?), so I thought: let's look at some poetry from criti-sized!
A wonderful poem, indeed. I think it has a nice charm to it and the imagery is beautiful. Good use of repetition, as well. So, excellent work and once again, thank you.
829AnaareFirst of all, thank you for the many reviews. I don't really read fiction on Fictionpress (weird, huh?), so I thought: let's look at some poetry from criti-sized!
A wonderful poem, indeed. I think it has a nice charm to it and the imagery is beautiful. Good use of repetition, as well. So, excellent work and once again, thank you.