Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Unknown Gods

9/9/2006 c1 6Arrows
This was pretty; I liked the message a lot. The only thing I noticed is that you could've done some more editing, especially in the first couple sentences. '...or even had flesh on her feet' would sound better as 'or had no flesh on her feet', and 'skeletal bones' is rudundant, don't you think? Other than that, good job. I would probably be a bit more surprised to encounter a talking crow than the main character in your story, but I can see how it works that she isn't. Good job, and keep writing :)

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service