for Copper Colored Dreams
939/12/2006 c1 sylvia's syndrome
I liked this. The rhyming was fluid and natural sounding. The images in this are vivid and interesting, as well. I really like the way this poem flows and the colorful, dramatic picture it creates in my mind’s eye. This poem definitely leaves a lingering impression upon the reader.
However, I have the same suggestion for you that I just gave another writer: utilize your summary. It is a free opportunity for you to express yourself and to draw in readers. You obviously have something to say, so don’t just waste with something as boring as “just another love poem.” We can see that it’s a poem and that you’ve put in it the love section. Tell us something we don’t know! Tell us what inspired the poem, tell us if you think you need to improve, tell us anything interesting! If you can’t think of anything, just put your favorite line from the poem – that’s better than “just another love poem.”
My second suggestion is that you get rid of all the bold and italics. The tools that allow you to make text bold or italicized are just that— tools. They are not available just for the hell of it; they are there to be used to enhance expression. When you use them on an entire poem, they lose all meaning.
I liked this. The rhyming was fluid and natural sounding. The images in this are vivid and interesting, as well. I really like the way this poem flows and the colorful, dramatic picture it creates in my mind’s eye. This poem definitely leaves a lingering impression upon the reader.
However, I have the same suggestion for you that I just gave another writer: utilize your summary. It is a free opportunity for you to express yourself and to draw in readers. You obviously have something to say, so don’t just waste with something as boring as “just another love poem.” We can see that it’s a poem and that you’ve put in it the love section. Tell us something we don’t know! Tell us what inspired the poem, tell us if you think you need to improve, tell us anything interesting! If you can’t think of anything, just put your favorite line from the poem – that’s better than “just another love poem.”
My second suggestion is that you get rid of all the bold and italics. The tools that allow you to make text bold or italicized are just that— tools. They are not available just for the hell of it; they are there to be used to enhance expression. When you use them on an entire poem, they lose all meaning.