for Of the Sea10/25/2006 c1 
41BearHeart
Ooh! Very nicely done. I think that I would put church and bell on the same line. The way it is written it stilts the flow. In the second last verse the last two lines don't flow as well as the rest. Just a suggestion: The words I've longed to hear The words everyone seeks
Excellent poem though. I am not sure I could pick out a favourite line. They just all belong together.
BearHeart
41BearHeartOoh! Very nicely done. I think that I would put church and bell on the same line. The way it is written it stilts the flow. In the second last verse the last two lines don't flow as well as the rest. Just a suggestion: The words I've longed to hear The words everyone seeks
Excellent poem though. I am not sure I could pick out a favourite line. They just all belong together.
BearHeart
10/24/2006 c1 NOLONGERAVAILABLE
nicely written. kinda makes me feel like tossing myself into the ocean or something, just for the tranquility of it all. very well written indeed. reminds me of Chopin's The Awakening, in the final scene. *tear*
nicely written. kinda makes me feel like tossing myself into the ocean or something, just for the tranquility of it all. very well written indeed. reminds me of Chopin's The Awakening, in the final scene. *tear*