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for Romans

7/3/2007 c1 7The Egg
The stuff you do is so short that it's hard to write reviews for them, but I decided that after reading the other three I would leave something digestable for the fourth. So here goes.

There's the beginning, the end, and all that 'blip' stuff in between. It's why people just scroll down after a few lines and skip to the very end so that they can review and say "Yay! Hoorah! So great!"

Actually, it was. Not 'great', not 'grood' either, but 'okay', and that's because I read the Farmer Brown one and know that you can come up with better ideas. You know what, ExplodingCongregation (I didn't like church either)? I think that you should go ahead and write a full-length script. The whole shebang. As in Acts, Scenes, and in betweens, friend. As in more than two or three or even four characters-hell, make a movie.

Make it about Romans.

Make it a roman-a-clef. Well, actually, maybe not. Talent comes from either boring people, inbalanced people, or geniuses. And no one cares about their lives.

Except John Irving, who's dialogue is not a far call from your style of dialogue (give him a shot, you'll like him. I suggest 'The World According to Garp' if I might plug an ad in for a second). He had a good life.

Anyway, really tap into your head and make us all a great story to enjoy...please.

That is all.
11/9/2006 c1 5Gilded Coins
I had to bite my knuckles. I love your sense of humor. Sam is so funny and Greg's not bad himself; I found both characters interesting and charismatic. I love the way Sam is always interrupting Greg, and how he went from /good/ to /great good/ to /grood/. With the portmanteau, the rudeness, the lack of logic, and the constant interrupting and misunderstanding, I felt Sam could have been a character out of one of Lewis Carroll's works. Ignore me: I love Lewis Carroll and usually end up finding similarities between his stuff and anything else I like.

I got this strange and probably completely-unfounded theory that Sam is some sort of muse and that Greg was only arguing with himself. That perhaps Greg is suffering writer's block and—no, no, better stop right there before I sound even sillier.

"...just so that I get start the goddamn thing." You meant "can start"?

"Tired of call it great and good-" Shouldn't that be "calling"?

"Don’t let the door hit you on your ass on your way out." I felt this line was a little watery. One prepositional phrase after another, both started by "on," sounds awkward to me.

Great job, adding to favorites.
11/9/2006 c1 6Julian Henleth
Good little dialogue. The ending lines were particularly funny.

Keep writing.
11/9/2006 c1 105Maggot Blood
Good story, Sam got me really confused near the starting but thats ok, he was meant to get me to say 'what the hell?' Good job on this one keep it up.

11/9/2006 c1 1special k-ayk
haha this is awesome! i was laughing my ass off by the time i got to the bottom of the page!
11/9/2006 c1 88multiples of six
This amused me! XD Especially that line about Times Square, but I was giggling the whole way through. =)

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