for Bulimia2/27/2009 c1 SomeNoBody
Wow, this is really good. It feels so real and matches my own experiences quite well. I know how awful it feels to think about what you just ate. It looked and tasted so good and even if you weren't hungry you'd eat it anyways. Then you start eating although you don't even want to and you start to feel bad even while you're eating and not only afterwards. You feel sick, really sick because of the food but mostly yourself and how you couldn't control yourself again. You tell yourself you'd just stop to eat so much but you soon see that it's not working but you still want to get rid of this guilt. You see the toilet which you see every day and somehow you remember something about throwing up and it's like a light bulb going on above your head. You're hesitant and it doesn't work at first but you soon get the hang of it and no one ever finds out. You feel affirmed and reassured because of that and at first you think you’re finally free from the guilt. You get used to throwing up and but the guilt just keeps growing because you still feel fat and you start to throw up even because of small bites of food. Then you start denying but the guilt of not only eating but also throwing up nags on your conscience. Badly. You're too ashamed to tell anyone and it seems so unreal that something that supposedly only happens to others happened to you. You tell yourself it isn't even that bad but it's only getting worse. This is at least what happened to me and this is the point where I turned my life around. I talked to my best friend (over the internet because she lives far away) and she encouraged me. I started reading some web pages about bulimia and how people got away from it. I started writing a journal about my eating habits and planed what I'd allow myself to eat to be healthy but not fat (about 20kcal) but the strongest support I got from my religion. God helped me out of this. I'm learning to accept myself and I only threw up about three times in months (which is really good for me) I never told my family or anyone besides my friend but I'm fine now. You can always turn back. It's never too late. You don't even need to only depend on yourself because God will help you if you're doing your best to get better. Don't let food and looks control your life.
Wow, this is really good. It feels so real and matches my own experiences quite well. I know how awful it feels to think about what you just ate. It looked and tasted so good and even if you weren't hungry you'd eat it anyways. Then you start eating although you don't even want to and you start to feel bad even while you're eating and not only afterwards. You feel sick, really sick because of the food but mostly yourself and how you couldn't control yourself again. You tell yourself you'd just stop to eat so much but you soon see that it's not working but you still want to get rid of this guilt. You see the toilet which you see every day and somehow you remember something about throwing up and it's like a light bulb going on above your head. You're hesitant and it doesn't work at first but you soon get the hang of it and no one ever finds out. You feel affirmed and reassured because of that and at first you think you’re finally free from the guilt. You get used to throwing up and but the guilt just keeps growing because you still feel fat and you start to throw up even because of small bites of food. Then you start denying but the guilt of not only eating but also throwing up nags on your conscience. Badly. You're too ashamed to tell anyone and it seems so unreal that something that supposedly only happens to others happened to you. You tell yourself it isn't even that bad but it's only getting worse. This is at least what happened to me and this is the point where I turned my life around. I talked to my best friend (over the internet because she lives far away) and she encouraged me. I started reading some web pages about bulimia and how people got away from it. I started writing a journal about my eating habits and planed what I'd allow myself to eat to be healthy but not fat (about 20kcal) but the strongest support I got from my religion. God helped me out of this. I'm learning to accept myself and I only threw up about three times in months (which is really good for me) I never told my family or anyone besides my friend but I'm fine now. You can always turn back. It's never too late. You don't even need to only depend on yourself because God will help you if you're doing your best to get better. Don't let food and looks control your life.
5/28/2007 c1 
52Frostany
Great, powerful writing. I was drawn in from the first sentence. The whole story was well structured and kept my attention. there was something that felt really honest about it. It raised a good question to, how do you know when you've crossed over the threshold of experimentation, to full fledged eating disorder. You don't really I guess, it's just a label, the label's not what's real about it as you pointed out in the first part of this story. It would be ridiculous to go around throwing the phrase bulimia everywhere. What's real is the way you realize that your legs are swollen from water retention and you still can't stop forcing yourself to puke, or when you realize you want to stop so bad, but you keep going back. That's what's real. Keep writing.
52FrostanyGreat, powerful writing. I was drawn in from the first sentence. The whole story was well structured and kept my attention. there was something that felt really honest about it. It raised a good question to, how do you know when you've crossed over the threshold of experimentation, to full fledged eating disorder. You don't really I guess, it's just a label, the label's not what's real about it as you pointed out in the first part of this story. It would be ridiculous to go around throwing the phrase bulimia everywhere. What's real is the way you realize that your legs are swollen from water retention and you still can't stop forcing yourself to puke, or when you realize you want to stop so bad, but you keep going back. That's what's real. Keep writing.
11/23/2006 c1 463All Alone With Her Thoughts
Where does it start? With the on-going pressure of Hollywood's skinny stars, or the thoughts that run through your head - and you don't know where they're coming from. Nice job.
Rowan.
463All Alone With Her ThoughtsWhere does it start? With the on-going pressure of Hollywood's skinny stars, or the thoughts that run through your head - and you don't know where they're coming from. Nice job.
Rowan.
11/23/2006 c1 93Alena D'Etoiles
Where -does- it begin? Hmm... Very nice poem. Made me think a litle bit, especally cuz one of my mom's old students is bulimic.
93Alena D'EtoilesWhere -does- it begin? Hmm... Very nice poem. Made me think a litle bit, especally cuz one of my mom's old students is bulimic.