for Fade Together11/27/2006 c1 temerity
Interesting with a good plot developing. I like it! However, there seems to be a little bit of inconsistancy-Victoria changes to Tori and back again, unless I'm not following something important. It would also be helpful if you fleshed out your characters a bit more. I can see them vaguely, but not as clearly as would be preferred. I'll be looking for another update!
Always write on :)
Interesting with a good plot developing. I like it! However, there seems to be a little bit of inconsistancy-Victoria changes to Tori and back again, unless I'm not following something important. It would also be helpful if you fleshed out your characters a bit more. I can see them vaguely, but not as clearly as would be preferred. I'll be looking for another update!
Always write on :)
11/27/2006 c1 
8You Make Me Smile A Lot
I really like how you were able to use first person p. o. v. and not make it sucky. I like the bond between the two main characters too. Plez write more! I promise I'll read.
8You Make Me Smile A LotI really like how you were able to use first person p. o. v. and not make it sucky. I like the bond between the two main characters too. Plez write more! I promise I'll read.