for Christmas Love Letters9/13/2007 c1 
77by His blood
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
fuck, yes.
and you even submitted it exactly a year later after my breakdown. (silent suicide)
i know this. i've felt this. i feel it still. screaming.
& you wrote it beautifully. this is perfect, and i fucking love it. amazing, as usual.
x3
77by His bloodyes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
fuck, yes.
and you even submitted it exactly a year later after my breakdown. (silent suicide)
i know this. i've felt this. i feel it still. screaming.
& you wrote it beautifully. this is perfect, and i fucking love it. amazing, as usual.
x3
1/17/2007 c1 170MallowsWins
Sometimes when I read a narrative, I find it a little self indlugent (not that there is anything wrong with the odd self indlugent ramble) but this was not what I expected. There was serious thought behind every word, and thought I personally love Christmas, I found myself feeling a shread of your pain. This was very well written, I'm impressed.
Peace, Daze
170MallowsWinsSometimes when I read a narrative, I find it a little self indlugent (not that there is anything wrong with the odd self indlugent ramble) but this was not what I expected. There was serious thought behind every word, and thought I personally love Christmas, I found myself feeling a shread of your pain. This was very well written, I'm impressed.
Peace, Daze
1/11/2007 c1 54kaylajac
"and it was then I wished (almost guiltily) that Jesus had been aborted"
Yeah, but then we'd all still be Jews! :3
54kaylajac"and it was then I wished (almost guiltily) that Jesus had been aborted"
Yeah, but then we'd all still be Jews! :3
1/3/2007 c1 871no.peace.los.angeles
Wow, I liked this. Really bitter and hard-hitting. You have just enough imagery to keep the poem an actual poem and not just narrative, and that's nice. Some of your ideas are so great, like wishing Jesus had been aborted and saying this person had never made promises like "I'll be home for Christmas" to you. The lines "but we were still suicide/even though our defeat bled differently against the dying horizon" are a bit emo for me, but they are quite beautiful. Nice work. Keep writing! :)
871no.peace.los.angelesWow, I liked this. Really bitter and hard-hitting. You have just enough imagery to keep the poem an actual poem and not just narrative, and that's nice. Some of your ideas are so great, like wishing Jesus had been aborted and saying this person had never made promises like "I'll be home for Christmas" to you. The lines "but we were still suicide/even though our defeat bled differently against the dying horizon" are a bit emo for me, but they are quite beautiful. Nice work. Keep writing! :)
12/29/2006 c1 24she's not breathing
nice, the way it's more narrative than anything else. but somehow - more than that? your description was beautiful, soso beautiful. heh. i think the poem actually struck me as pointless (in a good way) but then most poems that mention christmas seem to get my back up. i adore it.
-kait
24she's not breathingnice, the way it's more narrative than anything else. but somehow - more than that? your description was beautiful, soso beautiful. heh. i think the poem actually struck me as pointless (in a good way) but then most poems that mention christmas seem to get my back up. i adore it.
-kait
12/27/2006 c1 330in a jar pk
the line about jesus being aborted was genius...
i kinda wrote something around that line; would you mind if i put it up? i'll give you full credit. x
330in a jar pkthe line about jesus being aborted was genius...
i kinda wrote something around that line; would you mind if i put it up? i'll give you full credit. x
12/23/2006 c1 9Pterodactyl Poke
This was very good. The heartache presented really makes the reader FEEL it.
One small grammatical problem, however.
"but underneath there is only dead tree branches and withered leaves..."
"There is" should be replaced with "there are"
Keep writing, dear!
9Pterodactyl PokeThis was very good. The heartache presented really makes the reader FEEL it.
One small grammatical problem, however.
"but underneath there is only dead tree branches and withered leaves..."
"There is" should be replaced with "there are"
Keep writing, dear!