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1/15/2007 c4 27Zakuyoe
I will await your next update.

Some of the chapters are awfully short though. Like, three dialects long? I guess it wouldn't be too bad inserting a couple of emotions, at least.

Anyway, my dad's home... gotta get off the comp. sorry for the small review!
1/15/2007 c2 Zakuyoe
Chapters are kinda short... but that's not a bad thing.

OMG I can't believe I realized that you're using a character "Luke" as well! As of now he seems to be in a better position than mine is, possibly will be. But gah! I REALLY love that name! So hehe, that's my shortened rant of my liking of the name "Luke"

Anyway, another chapter I go... or part, I guess
1/15/2007 c1 Zakuyoe
I thought I'd check out some of your work, sorta like in appreciation of you reading my stuff.

I can say that I do like the plot. It took me about 2 seconds to figure out why you had seven chapters under one "chapter;" I realized that you were doing this in parts.

I like the dialogue, though it could be longer. Of course, I'm not sure how hypocritical I'm being when I say that, but it's some good advice. Generally detail is nice, though I don't think this story needs a whole lot of it.

I hope you don't think I'm bashing this, because I don't really mean to. I'll keep reading now, and I wish you luck on this! (Unless you've finished, in which case I haven't done my homework to find the "completed" status of it)

-Zak
1/11/2007 c4 8failte200
Slow the heck down! :)

Okay - good char dev, and you got an intricate situation building... it may last a whole chapter! :) Kidding. Why aren't you telling us - at length - how guilty Jake feels?
1/11/2007 c2 failte200
"If you're reading this and you've come this far, why not go ahead and review?"

Lol. Fine. here it is.

I obviously like the story, enough to have read through the second "part" - Jake and Luke are sweet. But things are happening so FAST! You need to slow down, let us readers savor important moments - their first kiss, their first sex, Jake's coming out, etc. Figure out a way to pad it out, like telling us more about what they're each FEELING and stuff.

Still - it gives me warm-fuzzies, and I like your characters. lessee if you develop them more as I read on, here...
1/9/2007 c4 12unknwnfuture
I love the turn of events too! Really good, can't wait to read what you come up with next! Update son please.
1/2/2007 c2 Dan
Jo! I truly liked it, seriously. I don't mean to go downhill, but we need some action, cough *a third guy* cough. It's pretty good, trust me, little chapters, leaving something to the imagination. Good through and through!

Happy New Year!

Atte. Dan!
1/2/2007 c3 unknwnfuture
OOh soo good! I'm looking forward to reading more of the college experience that they are having.
1/2/2007 c1 unknwnfuture
Oh no that's so sad! (the accident) great first chapter, (or 7 if you count the ones in the actual chapter itself). But yeah this is a really great story so far I can't wait to read the next couple chapters you have out. :)
12/29/2006 c2 2spadz
you know i started reading and i didnt know if i was going to finish it, but im glad i did. i like the story and i have to say it is very well written keep it up
12/28/2006 c1 12Ben Wuest
Oh my god, if you don't continue this project, you're an IDIOT! This is so good and it's hott and it's going at a very fast pace, and I LOVE it! Seriously, keep going or I'll be PISSED!

B.

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