for The Tree Swing12/25/2016 c1 Eucatastrophe9
Hi! I just read your story and God, this is amazing! I've been speechless ever since I read this work of yours and needless to say, had chills while I read your work. I'm going to read your other stories too! And I hope you continue posting here on this site even today. :) :)
Hi! I just read your story and God, this is amazing! I've been speechless ever since I read this work of yours and needless to say, had chills while I read your work. I'm going to read your other stories too! And I hope you continue posting here on this site even today. :) :)
10/30/2012 c1 AC MC Mahon
As I dream of those warm summer days fluttering away I squat in the creek that no longer flows. I stop to remember the honeysuckle and the suckle. The raspberry and burrs in the field I ran through. The Hut the lost trail in the woods with that tall swing above the butterflys grasshoppers and clover . The redbirds forgotten moved on. Ich Thou flew away where we could and did breathe in awe as we felt the moon and the sun rise anew. The dawn overshadowing the dark mist and wonder leaving us to wander the same depths while sliding and singing over the cacaphonopy. The wind carrying the toads croaked then tweeted beyond the solid spring. Cheers.
As I dream of those warm summer days fluttering away I squat in the creek that no longer flows. I stop to remember the honeysuckle and the suckle. The raspberry and burrs in the field I ran through. The Hut the lost trail in the woods with that tall swing above the butterflys grasshoppers and clover . The redbirds forgotten moved on. Ich Thou flew away where we could and did breathe in awe as we felt the moon and the sun rise anew. The dawn overshadowing the dark mist and wonder leaving us to wander the same depths while sliding and singing over the cacaphonopy. The wind carrying the toads croaked then tweeted beyond the solid spring. Cheers.
2/25/2012 c1 So you'd think
this story would have more reviews.
I'm not so inclined to like the tragedy/sad type of storys, but in writing it, you did very well, the picture you painted was very easy to picture.
Its not my type of thing as I said, but its very emotion taunting[ or 'evocative' as my teacher would say]
this story would have more reviews.
I'm not so inclined to like the tragedy/sad type of storys, but in writing it, you did very well, the picture you painted was very easy to picture.
Its not my type of thing as I said, but its very emotion taunting[ or 'evocative' as my teacher would say]
11/22/2007 c1 
9seventhchords
I liked the intrigue in this. I've always thought that empty places would serve as a wonderful inspiration for stories, and though I never could find the words to express my thoughts on it well enough, I thought you did a good job with this. I really liked the wistful tone in this piece as well. My only qualm would be that last bit at the end, which I found rather awkward as it seemed to break the flow of the story. Other than that though, it was quite a decent piece actually. Good work!
9seventhchordsI liked the intrigue in this. I've always thought that empty places would serve as a wonderful inspiration for stories, and though I never could find the words to express my thoughts on it well enough, I thought you did a good job with this. I really liked the wistful tone in this piece as well. My only qualm would be that last bit at the end, which I found rather awkward as it seemed to break the flow of the story. Other than that though, it was quite a decent piece actually. Good work!
3/1/2007 c1 22Agent Firefly
I like the flow of this story and the sadness behind it. It seems connected to that poem about the snow but I don't know if that was intended. The story has a kind of antiquated feeling, like a period piece, but the style it's written in is intriguingly modern and poetic. I especially like the last few lines, very mysterious and weird and beautiful.
22Agent FireflyI like the flow of this story and the sadness behind it. It seems connected to that poem about the snow but I don't know if that was intended. The story has a kind of antiquated feeling, like a period piece, but the style it's written in is intriguingly modern and poetic. I especially like the last few lines, very mysterious and weird and beautiful.
1/30/2007 c1 16Patches McGee
Aawh, I thought this was so sad... It's beautiful, and haunting, and your description is awesome. I really like this, the repetition was really effective, and I can really feel the despair the narrator feels. Really good work. =]
16Patches McGeeAawh, I thought this was so sad... It's beautiful, and haunting, and your description is awesome. I really like this, the repetition was really effective, and I can really feel the despair the narrator feels. Really good work. =]
1/22/2007 c1 scotti
This was beautiful! Short, sad, heart-string pulling-ly beautiful!
I just wish i knew what happened to the young girl... Wonderful set of scenes you've painted and you did it in such rich colors too...Just enough description in each panel that it left the reader wanting more...to have that chance to partake with the narrator in the young woman's life. Nice Job Lux! On to read more of your work!
~~Scottie
This was beautiful! Short, sad, heart-string pulling-ly beautiful!
I just wish i knew what happened to the young girl... Wonderful set of scenes you've painted and you did it in such rich colors too...Just enough description in each panel that it left the reader wanting more...to have that chance to partake with the narrator in the young woman's life. Nice Job Lux! On to read more of your work!
~~Scottie
1/10/2007 c1 Freaks for Jesus
i felt like crying when i read this. it is so beautiful.
i felt like crying when i read this. it is so beautiful.
1/5/2007 c1 5Silver Dolphin
Beautiful, and melancholy. Very romantic (especially the section about the bridge) without being sappy. It really creates that 'golden haze' effect of old summer memories. Your structure works well, and the last paragraph is intriguing. I wonder what happened to her... And what happened to him.
5Silver DolphinBeautiful, and melancholy. Very romantic (especially the section about the bridge) without being sappy. It really creates that 'golden haze' effect of old summer memories. Your structure works well, and the last paragraph is intriguing. I wonder what happened to her... And what happened to him.
1/1/2007 c1 15To Be Ascertained
I loved this story! There was so much description and emotion in it, and a lot of mystery about the characters. The way you used similar phrases very cleverly showed the futility of the character's thoughts and memories, and the uselessness of life. The last phrase confused me slightly, with the subject suddenly changing from plucking petals from a rose to invisible walls. I like your user name. Is it Latin for light in holding, or light in something? I forget...
15To Be AscertainedI loved this story! There was so much description and emotion in it, and a lot of mystery about the characters. The way you used similar phrases very cleverly showed the futility of the character's thoughts and memories, and the uselessness of life. The last phrase confused me slightly, with the subject suddenly changing from plucking petals from a rose to invisible walls. I like your user name. Is it Latin for light in holding, or light in something? I forget...
12/31/2006 c1 43lronMaiden
that was quite interesting. your language is beautiful and the imagery is strong in this piece, and so are the feelings/mood. the whole thing had a sort of lonely feel to it, which is why i like it. the nly thing is, some of your sentences are too long and hence a bit awkward. long sentences are fine, but it's usually best to spread them out and vary your sentence lengths more. too many long ones so close together will mak your reader 'breathless' and sometimes bored. but overall, i really like this piece.
43lronMaidenthat was quite interesting. your language is beautiful and the imagery is strong in this piece, and so are the feelings/mood. the whole thing had a sort of lonely feel to it, which is why i like it. the nly thing is, some of your sentences are too long and hence a bit awkward. long sentences are fine, but it's usually best to spread them out and vary your sentence lengths more. too many long ones so close together will mak your reader 'breathless' and sometimes bored. but overall, i really like this piece.