for Blind Yourself2/21/2007 c2 Now-Closed
*snickers* Lucas seems like a bit of a doofus to me. I really do like how natural the interaction between your characters is.
*snickers* Lucas seems like a bit of a doofus to me. I really do like how natural the interaction between your characters is.
2/20/2007 c4 
25Esquirella
First of all, Lucas is an ass to do that to his brother, no matter what. Very cold. Secondly, I no longer like Kayla for just waltzing right by without even making an attempt to save her best friend too. So I'm not all that sypmathetic to Lucas' mangled face right now. Thirdly ... huh? He got off the bus just like that?
25EsquirellaFirst of all, Lucas is an ass to do that to his brother, no matter what. Very cold. Secondly, I no longer like Kayla for just waltzing right by without even making an attempt to save her best friend too. So I'm not all that sypmathetic to Lucas' mangled face right now. Thirdly ... huh? He got off the bus just like that?
2/18/2007 c4 Lyricalia
Look! I created an account :D!YAY for your story!
(Thank you very much for telling me you've updated :) )
Okay, when i ended this chapter i was like "Ok. i like him. he ..he..he thinks...a LOT.OMG."
Yup, i very much liked the chapter- it got me anxious all along the bus' ride. Some people call it suspense.
I call it my death. But, oh well.
I so don't KNOW where you are going, that i can't predict whatis going to happen. Okay, i do, or try, but i come with so much possibilities that...is almost like not knowing anything.
And i LOVE stories like this.
I'll be lookin' forward the update! And so much thank you again.
Look! I created an account :D!YAY for your story!
(Thank you very much for telling me you've updated :) )
Okay, when i ended this chapter i was like "Ok. i like him. he ..he..he thinks...a LOT.OMG."
Yup, i very much liked the chapter- it got me anxious all along the bus' ride. Some people call it suspense.
I call it my death. But, oh well.
I so don't KNOW where you are going, that i can't predict whatis going to happen. Okay, i do, or try, but i come with so much possibilities that...is almost like not knowing anything.
And i LOVE stories like this.
I'll be lookin' forward the update! And so much thank you again.
2/17/2007 c4 3Abstruse Blue
I thought it was all believable. Very good chapter! I really like this story.
3Abstruse BlueI thought it was all believable. Very good chapter! I really like this story.
2/17/2007 c4 7KaleLongsworth
I hope his neighbor listens to the warning. If they don't, oh well. Sucks for them When are we going to see Arthur again? I liked him, he seemed cool.
7KaleLongsworthI hope his neighbor listens to the warning. If they don't, oh well. Sucks for them When are we going to see Arthur again? I liked him, he seemed cool.
2/17/2007 c4 5tearitrightup
nice, NICE. DAMN this is so thrilling. she is so smart it's unbelievable. i hope nothing bad happens to her...although i'm pretty sure something is gonna happen to her.
5tearitrightupnice, NICE. DAMN this is so thrilling. she is so smart it's unbelievable. i hope nothing bad happens to her...although i'm pretty sure something is gonna happen to her.
2/17/2007 c4 1reddkitsune
dude...mr. bus driver ish scary. and i really hope lucas is alive... update soon!
~neely~
1reddkitsunedude...mr. bus driver ish scary. and i really hope lucas is alive... update soon!
~neely~
2/17/2007 c4 1otiose
Gah, I had a whole nice review all typed up and I was just about to hit "submit" when Firefox decided to be evil and quit on me. Sad day!
Anywho, you picked the absolute WORST place to stop the chapter, and I think I'm going to have to hate you now until this is updated. XD When I went to click to the next chapter and saw that there was none, I groaned really loudly and my roommate looked at me like I was strange. But it's so good!
First of all, it's a lot different than most of the things around here, and it's written well, both of which are automatic wins. Second, I really like Steven and all his complicated thinking. I'd like to think that I would be that rational in such a situation, but I'm probably deluding myself. And I felt so bad for him when he got left on the bus! ;_; But that's okay, because Arthur can fwoosh in and save him! Hee hee...
I didn't feel that it was too detailed at all. As a matter of fact, the whole kidnapping thing seemed a little too fast, but that might just be because I was getting rather into it and reading quickly. But is there a reason that Steven dislikes buses so much? He really didn't want to get on, but I don't remember ever hearing why.
Muahahaha anyway, I'm very much looking forward to the next chapter. ^_^
1otioseGah, I had a whole nice review all typed up and I was just about to hit "submit" when Firefox decided to be evil and quit on me. Sad day!
Anywho, you picked the absolute WORST place to stop the chapter, and I think I'm going to have to hate you now until this is updated. XD When I went to click to the next chapter and saw that there was none, I groaned really loudly and my roommate looked at me like I was strange. But it's so good!
First of all, it's a lot different than most of the things around here, and it's written well, both of which are automatic wins. Second, I really like Steven and all his complicated thinking. I'd like to think that I would be that rational in such a situation, but I'm probably deluding myself. And I felt so bad for him when he got left on the bus! ;_; But that's okay, because Arthur can fwoosh in and save him! Hee hee...
I didn't feel that it was too detailed at all. As a matter of fact, the whole kidnapping thing seemed a little too fast, but that might just be because I was getting rather into it and reading quickly. But is there a reason that Steven dislikes buses so much? He really didn't want to get on, but I don't remember ever hearing why.
Muahahaha anyway, I'm very much looking forward to the next chapter. ^_^
2/16/2007 c3 Shin-Ora
Oh, Wow. This is so awesome. I'm really loving this. Steven reminds me of my best friend. The only thing I can see is my friend with his dark blonde hair, and his skinny little self. It's so strange to think like that.
Though, I'm kind of confused. Is the bus driver kidnapping everyone in the vehicle? I mean, if I seriously think about it, I don't think that could happen. You have Lucas who, I can only imagine, has the body of a wrestler, and four other people to take this one guy on.
Oh, Wow. This is so awesome. I'm really loving this. Steven reminds me of my best friend. The only thing I can see is my friend with his dark blonde hair, and his skinny little self. It's so strange to think like that.
Though, I'm kind of confused. Is the bus driver kidnapping everyone in the vehicle? I mean, if I seriously think about it, I don't think that could happen. You have Lucas who, I can only imagine, has the body of a wrestler, and four other people to take this one guy on.
2/16/2007 c2 20TUS
Hmm...I don't have time to finish...but I promise I will...
I really like it, so far it's got something that's completely it's own...The characters seem so real, so visible in your mind...
Anyway...I probably won't be finishing up until Monday or so, but if I don't review again, remind me and I'll be sure to finish...It's got my attention and I'm unhappy that I can't finish it now.
20TUSHmm...I don't have time to finish...but I promise I will...
I really like it, so far it's got something that's completely it's own...The characters seem so real, so visible in your mind...
Anyway...I probably won't be finishing up until Monday or so, but if I don't review again, remind me and I'll be sure to finish...It's got my attention and I'm unhappy that I can't finish it now.
2/12/2007 c3 Kaiserin Tammy
Okay, you got me hooked.
May I ask for the update? Cuz i think i pretty much like your characters. And i so much wanted arthur to be in the 'public transportation' xD.
Now, that would be pretty cliche-ed. And realistic (it has happened to me so many times before...it is sort of funny. Sort of.)
Also, i like the twists -unespectedness- of the story.
Please update soon!:)
Okay, you got me hooked.
May I ask for the update? Cuz i think i pretty much like your characters. And i so much wanted arthur to be in the 'public transportation' xD.
Now, that would be pretty cliche-ed. And realistic (it has happened to me so many times before...it is sort of funny. Sort of.)
Also, i like the twists -unespectedness- of the story.
Please update soon!:)