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for Slapdash Superior Sell Its Soul

3/11/2007 c1 478speakeasy-love
I finally got to your story. No insult intended, i really am this lazy. unfortunatly, few complantes. How many people are in this room? i counted like 5 then counted again and got 4, baffiling. try double spacing your text when you have fast dialog, it makes it less confusing like:

"bla bla" yelled mike

"Well bla bla!" sam yelled back.

sal, salinger. dont nick name people so early, its way confusing O.o...

um...i think thats all...thats all i can remember. Sorry if you feel insulted, i personly always like it when people critisize my work.

unfortunatly i cant really be sure of my opinoin on HOW you write considering most of this was dialog, but from what i read i liked. Cant wait for more! make love, not war.

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