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for Six Weeks With Satan

4/16/2007 c5 24DancingChaChaFruit
Hola! Just wondering, but did you happen to post this around midnight? Because, since you're from Massachusettes, I was thinking we're in the same time zone (EST), and I got the email alert from this chapter at exactly 12:03, according to my email. I actually ended up reading it at 1 in the morning instead of developing theses (yes, multiple) for English class (just the sentences though; not a full-fledged papers). Incase you were wondering. Since, y'know, I'm sure you were.

"We all clapped awkwardly." - Lol. So true. I hate it when people tell you to "give yourself a round of applause" or "give yourselves a pat on the back." It's just... weird. And awkward. =P

Ew. That creep is... creepy. Sketchy McSketchball about suits him. Hehe. And I can't believe Bryce's pickup line. It's so ridiculous that it's hilarious.

Just something I was thinking about. This trip is AFTER Lotte's senior year, right? I think that's a little weird because, by this point, Lotte would technically no longer be a student at her high school and would therefore no longer be in the school's choir. Unless it's her churches choir. But I get the feeling it isn't since she talks about her school and stuff. Also-and maybe this is just something my friends and I do-but by now, wouldn't Lotte and same-aged friends be referring to themselves as freshman in college? ...And Brigid wouldn't technically be considered a freshman anymore, since that year is over for her.

Okay. Moving on. "Never Have I Ever"! Omg! Except sometimes we call it "Never Ever Have I Ever." We sort of use the two titles interchangably. I always win this game, though, because I'm basically a virgin at life. Seriously. I'm basically Eden's clone, minus the appearance. Although I've played it with drinks before (sodas, not alcohol, though apparently the game was designed to play with alcohol), where you have to take a sip of your drink instead of simply putting a finger down. (Haha, this reminds me of one time when I played this game with my friends, only we called it G-rated and basically said stupid things like "never have I ever been on an airplane." But I'm sure you don't care. Sorry.)

Okay, sorry if that was little TMI about my life. But I like how you used this to portray people's characters. I have a friend like Jane, actually, but that's completely not the point. The point is, you used this well. And I like that Lotte's not your stereotypical "life virgin" like many of the protagonists here on FP. Granted, a lot aren't either, but... yeah. Whatever.

Ooh, strip poker. I've never played that either. Except I don't know how to play poker. I mean, I was taught numerous times before, but I ALWAYS forget. I dunno. I guess I figure it's a pointless thing to know, and I have a tendency to forget things I find pointless. Anyway, this night certainly is going to be interesting ;).

Ew. Junior spring. Don't remind me.

So here's the part where I answer your questions:

My favorite character is probably Eden, just because, like I said, I'm pretty much her clone. And you know, people tend to like the people they're most similar too. (I actually learned in my Psychology class that you're more inclined to help a random stranger if they're similar to you in some way.) Sorry I can't be of a bit more help, but you wanted an answer and that's mine.

What aspect of the story do I like the most? Hm. Probably just that it's so realistic. Lotte seems like your average, run-of-the-mill character, and I like that she's not overly... I don't know. Different, I think. Also, the way you're portrayting Kurt's feelings seems pretty accurate-at least, to me it does. Guys are buttheads (I can't believe I just used that word) to the people they like, sometimes. It's a fact.

Most improvement? Eck. I'm only really good at this con crit stuff when a story has a SERIOUS flaw. As in, a big gaping hole in the plotline or atrocious grammar or something. None of which apply to you. I guess... you have so many characters in this story-ones that seem important to the story, I mean-that not all of them get sufficient characterization. I know it's difficult, and I'm not necessarily recommending you cut out some characters, I'm just saying. You might want to work on that.

And... that's it. This is probably THE longest review I've ever written anyone. And that's saying something, since I always have the longest reviews anyone has ever seen. Seriously, I always get replies from authors saying "Your reviews are so long!" Heh. Like I said, sorry if I gave a little TMI about my personal life, but oh well. You told me sometime earlier that you don't mind, so I just hope I wasn't pushing the limit.

Right. Going now. To... Ah. Finish a practice AP test for Psychology. Fun.

See ya next time! =)
4/16/2007 c5 3I Quoth Nevermore
Great udpate. I like all the game they played. Haha, very fun. And adding Neil was great. Now Kurt has some competition! Oh. I like Eden, but I don't know if she's my favorite. She is close though. She's a fun characters, I think. And Jane is such a rebel. It's great. And Lotte has attitude! Wo. Please update!
4/16/2007 c5 3phelps112
nice. wearing a bra for strip poker is always a good thing.
4/16/2007 c5 3laspoonsduh
ok that was a hilarious way to end things. i loved this chapter. too. i hope you update soon!
4/16/2007 c5 cowow
hey :) i started reading your story today and it's really good.

i like the concept of your story. haha.

update soon. ΓΌ
4/16/2007 c5 5S. N. Sedivec
This chapter was pretty good. Um... I LOVE Niels. lol. Don't let her end up with Kurt, please. lol - No, Kurt is good for her and she'll see it eventually. I can't wait to hear about his singing voice. (good singers get me every time.) See you next chapter.
4/15/2007 c5 crymson tears
I like Kurt the most, mainly because he's such an enigma. I also like the whole eden/matt thing, and I hop we see more of that. I hope this helped!

4/8/2007 c4 2muryoutaisuu
hey! great story!

just wondering what are footballers doing in the choir group? or are they apart of the orchestra or something?

i dont know much about musical aspects but dont think footballers would be interested in singing their hearts out or playing the triangle. just my curiosity working over time.

update soon!


muryoutaisuu. ^^"
4/7/2007 c1 24DancingChaChaFruit
Okay, sorry my last review ended so abruptly. I accidentally hit the "submit review" button, even though I wasn't finished.'

Aw, people think she and Kurt would be a cute couple. ;) Gotta love that foreshadowing. Hehe.

And... actually, I think I was pretty much finished with that last review. Oh well. See ya next time! =)
4/7/2007 c4 DancingChaChaFruit
Aw, poor Lotte =(. Kurt's so mean to her. I can understand why she hates him so much; I'd probably hate him too =P. But you've done a good thing here by showing how differently he treats her and other people. Not only does it show something about his character, but I think it shows that he likes her in a more-than-platonic way ;).

Although, I have to admit, some of the things he does are funny, even if they're also mean.

Bryce is a nice fellow, though. I like him. =)

Though if I'm to be perfectly honest, the singing part kind of bored me. I just don't really see how showing the words that they sang and describing the... recital (? don't know what to call it; my brain died) helped further the plot along, other than that it showed that Lotte really likes singing and that she sings well. But I think that could have been portrayed through something else.
4/2/2007 c4 3violin-lady13
yeah! go sopranos! :-) in case you hadn't figured it out, i'm ridiculously into music/singing (i sing soprano and play violin), so this story is EXACTLY the sort of stuff i love to read. you write it very, very, very well...and your characters are fantastic and multi-dimensional. one inconsistency i spotted: in the chapter where you introduce Bryce, you say that he's the only football player in the choir; then, later, in the scene with Brigid, there's 3 gigantic football players ganging up on her. also, although the party scene is really well written, i'm not sure if realistically it makes a whole lot of sense. would they really be able to get away with something like that in a hotel w/o the teachers knowing? i honestly don't know, i've never been on a huge school trip like that, so i don't know what the atmosphere is really like on them. just guessing. those two are minor things, though, so no worries: they don't detract from the story line at all! can't wait to read a new update, sorry about your 11th grade craziness. i know how it is...i have a really hard time updating my story, too, all b/c of school.

4/2/2007 c4 2CarlyJo
Great Update. I love the characters. Update Soon!
4/2/2007 c4 2Jessie Gee
I like this piece. Especially the dialogue. I give you a cookie up for that.

Good luck with this story. I'll be watching you. O_O I need an update and a few more laughs! Haha!
4/1/2007 c4 3I Quoth Nevermore
Yay! I love this update. And the songs and the way you set up the concert was great. So, is there a real (secret) reason why Kurt was in Lotte's room? Hmm. Please update! I was going to leave an super long review (yeah, that's right, I just said super long in a serious sentence) but it's really late. I promise one next time! UPDATE!
4/1/2007 c4 crymson tears
haha, i know...*twilight zone* theme. hey lokk! angel reviwed for you story! dmonic destiny is her penname.
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