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for When Lockers Break

3/21/2008 c1 8lunacy and literacy
This is... absolutely amazing. I want more. Desperately. I really have no need to say more because it would just be me rambling about how awesome your writing is. I love it.
11/3/2007 c1 2NRsaint
o this is good! i hope u update soon
9/1/2007 c1 8incandescente
Evidently, the definition of ‘lasting long’ differed with certain situations.

My window pane had heated up, to what I am sure was the melting point of glass, and pretty soon it would all melt away into a very hot puddle of glassy goo on my carpet, leaving me to the mercy of The Sun.

After which she gathered them up in her arms and dumped them very, very messily onto my bed. My very clean and very neat bed. My very clean…

When Madeleine swapped me for international business, it made perfectly good sense that I make Jasmine’s home, well mine.

Sigh. Breakfast had never been so mesmerising.

I liked the way you imitated drowsy thoughts, when the thoughts are not aligned and jumbled up together.. Especially right before Tamora almost fell asleep.

You had me smirking for quite awhile at the above sentences I picked out. I liked how you mismashed sarcastic wit and the stifling heat and how everything changed when the sister came. woohoo!

I look forward to more of this story! Is Pierce for the older brother or the angry man? or gasp! they know each other!
5/9/2007 c1 swimchickslam
Haha sounds interesting. Hope you update soon :]
4/29/2007 c1 ess3sandra
hello you, a gorgeous hot older brothers best friend and a dangerous green eyes monster, i will enjoy this! and the pierce thing was very smart, i am still in my phase, and i hope i will tay in it forever, and im 19. ha.
4/16/2007 c1 12elisefey
Alright, I'm here to return the favor of your super long and gloriously thought out review to "Island Olivier" which I so thoroughly appreciated. You really have no idea. Anyway...

[In the month of mishaps, fortune and other strange unnameable things... ] - I love this line. I’ve never heard November described that but it just tells me exactly what to expect from this story, it’s a great opener!

[Limp and limp and limp…] - I’m loving this narrative voice. It walks a nice fine line between poetic and humorously sarcastic. Not easy to do.

[It was like the world, so inactive, was coated in old, dusty cobwebs.] - I like that description. It’s so visual while describing something tactile. It’s cool.

[My beloved sister standing there with her arms outstretched, still laden with huge bags, a brilliant smile lighting up her tanned face.] - Wow, you can actually feel the love just in the details she uses to describe her sister.

[I laughed my manly laugh, you know that loud, really unladylike rumble, that had your mother frantically searching for a professional voice coach and your father edging away from you, slightly disturbed that such a cute, little person could make such a loud noise. ] - LOL!

[You’re thinking, what happened to sibling rivalry, that famed mutual hatred, that carnal desire to violently rip each other’s hair out- but sorry to disappoint you, this story doesn’t specialise in that sort of thing.] - Ha ha! That’s awesome! I love it. I love my sister too.

[The fact was: Madeleine equalled mess.] - Hmm… That’s freakishly like my sister too…

[Ok, so I opened the fridge door- but hasty!-do not be so easily deceived. For this was no ordinary fridge door.] - I think I’m gonna pee my pants from laughing so hard!

[Their central heating must be playing up too.] - LOL! No, nothing to do with him at all…

[I suppose I should be thankful since right then I was dangerously nearing…danger territory.] - I’m so going to be quoting this later with my friends.

[I pressed in delicately, not wanting to offend or alarm the locker in any way.] - Indeed. Lockers are tricky, skittish beasts. Argh!

[I’ll cool your burning throat, I’ll do things you’ve never dream-] - ROTFL!

[“Listen, buddy, you’ve got two choices,” I whispered dangerously, dimly aware of the water fountain egging me on, “either you obey me and open up like a good little locker should or I-”] - Oh my gosh! I just love how she gives personality to all these inanimate objects!

Seriously, Tamara’s narrative voice is amazing. She’s so much fun to read! I also love the relationships Tamara has with those around her: her sister, her best-friend, her friend’s family (particularly the brother). She even has relationships with her physical surroundings that make her so insanely entertaining. These relationships make it so much more exciting to want to find out what her relationship to the angry green-eyed boy is going to be and how it’s going to manifest itself. I’m absolutely loving this story! Please update soon, if you can!
4/10/2007 c1 4In.the.Wardrobe
heh. great first chapter. and i've so done that with my older brother's friends. just glance once and pret im not interested and then when im sure they aren't looking, take another peek but then they ARE looking and i pretend im looking past them. oh god, so humiliating. heh. especially the good looking ones. sigh... so, i cant wiat for more. update soon!
4/5/2007 c1 Lindy
Ohyesyes! [nodnod] I will bear with you; not 'cause it's boring, but because it's refreshing. ^3^

Really long for a first chapter but it did the job of introducing everyone and setting the story. I wannawanna read more 'cause I want to try figure out what'll happen so hope you can update soon. x3 Also wanna see more about Tamara.

For some reason, I get a tinge of cliche when I read this but in a good way! w At least we know she's so adorable and cute! It would've been funny if all these hots guys started liking this whale of a beastly woman and..and...I'm so shallow. ._.;

Ohwel. xD;
4/5/2007 c1 Frenchyesca
I liked this, it was a very good first chapter, it wasn't the least bit boring.

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