for Breaking The Mirror5/9/2007 c13 magalina
lol I have three brothers too, and a sister... but the interruptions were from my dad... and he could actually read what I was reading, so I had to close the window every time... I´m a bit paranoid, but he´s about the only person (besides me) in that house that read fast English :/
And YES! I´m glad he questioned him! And the bastard ran away leaving him there... for a moment I thought the guy was going to be Seaton, undercover cop XD But I kind of don´t think he´s a cop anymore... still intrigued about him. I hope he´s the one picking him up at... jail... lol I can´t believe he got arrested! And he isn´t freaking out! He´s all "fucking perfect Grr..." haha.
m, I feel sorry for all the girls Alfred brings home... and no matter how hadr I try, I can´t picture him being good looking. I just see a fat, beer belly guy, bald and short... and a fucking bastard XO
Update soon! And look! Long review yay!
lol I have three brothers too, and a sister... but the interruptions were from my dad... and he could actually read what I was reading, so I had to close the window every time... I´m a bit paranoid, but he´s about the only person (besides me) in that house that read fast English :/
And YES! I´m glad he questioned him! And the bastard ran away leaving him there... for a moment I thought the guy was going to be Seaton, undercover cop XD But I kind of don´t think he´s a cop anymore... still intrigued about him. I hope he´s the one picking him up at... jail... lol I can´t believe he got arrested! And he isn´t freaking out! He´s all "fucking perfect Grr..." haha.
m, I feel sorry for all the girls Alfred brings home... and no matter how hadr I try, I can´t picture him being good looking. I just see a fat, beer belly guy, bald and short... and a fucking bastard XO
Update soon! And look! Long review yay!
5/9/2007 c13 foxy501
wow!
wow!
5/9/2007 c13 
14Night Play
~~ i was hoping this would happen! Im so excited. you ended on a cliffhanger though! it's really good, so i'm not complaining- to much! xD! uplooadd quickly!
14Night Play~~ i was hoping this would happen! Im so excited. you ended on a cliffhanger though! it's really good, so i'm not complaining- to much! xD! uplooadd quickly!
5/9/2007 c13 chameleonduality
Ice-cream... tempting... *considering*...only if it's got those inner marshmallows on top! *giggle* I vote for chocolate chip! (Or Ben&Jerry's Bailey's, that was GOOD alcoholic-tasting ice-cream)
Holy fuck love! He just HAS to practically go get arrested the first minute he sells someone drugs! And that bastard Alfred got away! The injustice of it all! And the likelihood of the cops believing him is, well, about this much *holds up forefinger and thumb VERY close together*. Man, this just gets worse and worse for Jayden every chapter... and no, it doesn't make me feel any better, thank'ye kindly. And yet, it kinda does, I love the guy that much I'll even read about him getting arrested.
Gawd, Charlie just rises all my masochistic tendencies with his despicable actions. Castration's still my option of choice at the minute. It may change, depending on what my deranged mind can invent.
No triangle. Phew. I'm glad; relationships involving TWO people are complicated enough under normal circumstances, let alone three. And Jayden's circumstances certainly ain't normal. But yeah, he so belongs to Seaton - all that has to happen now is for wee (snort) oblivious Seaton to get it. Sigh. Men.
But yes Jayden, at least someone doesn't want you to talk. For the moment, anyway. *glomps Jayden* Even in moments of strife, he still has his delectable sarcasm.
Loving it! And you give quick updates! That's all I want in a story; interesting plot, good writing, and updates you don't have to wait YONKS for... woot!
Can't wait for the next chappie! ^.^
Peace.
Ice-cream... tempting... *considering*...only if it's got those inner marshmallows on top! *giggle* I vote for chocolate chip! (Or Ben&Jerry's Bailey's, that was GOOD alcoholic-tasting ice-cream)
Holy fuck love! He just HAS to practically go get arrested the first minute he sells someone drugs! And that bastard Alfred got away! The injustice of it all! And the likelihood of the cops believing him is, well, about this much *holds up forefinger and thumb VERY close together*. Man, this just gets worse and worse for Jayden every chapter... and no, it doesn't make me feel any better, thank'ye kindly. And yet, it kinda does, I love the guy that much I'll even read about him getting arrested.
Gawd, Charlie just rises all my masochistic tendencies with his despicable actions. Castration's still my option of choice at the minute. It may change, depending on what my deranged mind can invent.
No triangle. Phew. I'm glad; relationships involving TWO people are complicated enough under normal circumstances, let alone three. And Jayden's circumstances certainly ain't normal. But yeah, he so belongs to Seaton - all that has to happen now is for wee (snort) oblivious Seaton to get it. Sigh. Men.
But yes Jayden, at least someone doesn't want you to talk. For the moment, anyway. *glomps Jayden* Even in moments of strife, he still has his delectable sarcasm.
Loving it! And you give quick updates! That's all I want in a story; interesting plot, good writing, and updates you don't have to wait YONKS for... woot!
Can't wait for the next chappie! ^.^
Peace.
5/9/2007 c13 4Amindaya
Wonderful plot twist! This is GREAT, him getting arrested. I mean, bad for him, of course, but excellent in that it just opens it up for a bunch of stuff to happen! I'm all excited now, so you HAVE to update soon, or I think I may very possibly die. :D
4AmindayaWonderful plot twist! This is GREAT, him getting arrested. I mean, bad for him, of course, but excellent in that it just opens it up for a bunch of stuff to happen! I'm all excited now, so you HAVE to update soon, or I think I may very possibly die. :D
5/9/2007 c13 1partie traumatic
He can't go to jail!What's he gonna do?Poor Jayden.Now I'm really dying until your next chapter.
1partie traumaticHe can't go to jail!What's he gonna do?Poor Jayden.Now I'm really dying until your next chapter.
5/9/2007 c13 4mandrake-o
Yay! Story!
I'm sorry, I think my higher order brain functions have gone missing.
=) Mandraco.
4mandrake-oYay! Story!
I'm sorry, I think my higher order brain functions have gone missing.
=) Mandraco.
5/8/2007 c13 2Alex1316
At the end of this chapter i almost screamed aloud in frustration because i wanted to keep reading. please update as soon as possible.I just want to see the end of the story NOW, hahaha, as you can teel patience is not one of my virtues, and yet you have been an extremely frequent updater, and for that i thank you. so i guess, until next chapter...
~Alex
2Alex1316At the end of this chapter i almost screamed aloud in frustration because i wanted to keep reading. please update as soon as possible.I just want to see the end of the story NOW, hahaha, as you can teel patience is not one of my virtues, and yet you have been an extremely frequent updater, and for that i thank you. so i guess, until next chapter...
~Alex
5/8/2007 c13 25ConfigurationSpace
I'm really interested in where this story's going. :) It's lovely - I love Jayden's thought process.
25ConfigurationSpaceI'm really interested in where this story's going. :) It's lovely - I love Jayden's thought process.
5/8/2007 c13 7Love Eternally
Aw. Poor Jayden. But this chapter was definitely interesting. Seaton is going to kill him. his dad needs shot. . . and is there anyway i could take a fire poker after charlie? and his precious body parts? Please? Right after i take it out of a fire?
7Love EternallyAw. Poor Jayden. But this chapter was definitely interesting. Seaton is going to kill him. his dad needs shot. . . and is there anyway i could take a fire poker after charlie? and his precious body parts? Please? Right after i take it out of a fire?
5/8/2007 c13 5Squirrel Activist
Dude.
I was so not expecting that.
I mean, I should have expected that he'd get arrested, but I just didnt.
Haha.
Anyways.
Great chapter =D
5Squirrel ActivistDude.
I was so not expecting that.
I mean, I should have expected that he'd get arrested, but I just didnt.
Haha.
Anyways.
Great chapter =D
5/8/2007 c13 1Rebel 0ne
Aw, well, we knew it was going to happen sooner or later. Is Seaton going to bail him out now? I can't wait until they finally hook up and I definitely can't wait for Jayden's dad to get his ass kicked in.
1Rebel 0neAw, well, we knew it was going to happen sooner or later. Is Seaton going to bail him out now? I can't wait until they finally hook up and I definitely can't wait for Jayden's dad to get his ass kicked in.
5/8/2007 c13 3Lucas D
Oxymoronic you say? Well, I'm glad i'm not just the typical 'moron' ;)
Seriously, oxymorons are cool. 'Cold heat', 'dark light' and all that jazz... makes one seem unbelievably witty (stress on the 'unbelievable').
Now, on with the rant about the chapter.
I've noticed that you did reread it. Excellent! No one knows better than the author himself.
I usually don't do this, I just go with the flow, but I must request that you don't make Corin go after Jayden. He may not be Seaton's competition, but he sure seems like a nice guy, and making him go for Jayden will be somewhat of a cliche, especially since we know/guess what will happen next (Jayden thinks he's nice but still likes Seaton a lot, gets into some kind of compromising position with Corin, likes Corin but not as much as he likes Seaton, gets depressed about starting to have human feelings and so on). Make Seaton go for charlie or something. The evil ones should be happy too. Or better yet, have Corin to turn out to be Jay's best bud or something. They'll go sailing on expensive boats or whatever. Then you can kill him off, Corin that is. And make Jay all angsty...
... Alright, I will stop here. My mind wandered to another dimension and I lost control of my fingers. i think I got my point across, but maybe you could surprise me and make that one-sided Jay/Corin into something more that the cliche it threatens to become.
And police! Finally, i thought no law will ever be introduced into this story. It's just that with every chapter the story seems to get more deranged and illegal, and I was anxious to see some good ol' american cops come out to play.
And that moment when Alfred exclaimed 'Cash only' made me ponder something. I know he's saying that because he really needs the cash, not because he really cares for his son all that much, but I wonder if he knows about what Charlie's been up to? I mean, it is kind of hard to NOT notice your son and another male get into a room, moan for a few hours then come out looking rather disheveled. In case you mentioned it somewhere and I just don't remember - my apologies.
About Charlie again, I realise he manipulates the kid, but he does it oh so greatly, and Jayden seemed to comply every time, that I can't help but wonder what happened? I mean, why did he stop? Did he leave and gave Jayden a break, or did the kid stood up for himself (I doubt the latter though). Again, if you already explained that earlier and I just wasn't paying attention - perdono!
Oh, and I wonder what Alfred does to get all those women. There must be something (positively) special about him. Three nipples? five testicles? you're the author...
And of course, do not answer any of those. I'd like to find out as the story progresses.
And I haven't really accepted the lesbians... Alright, maybe i have in some twisted way, but that doesn't mean you have to torture me with their lightness every time. I like angst just as much. And if it's ice-cream this time, pistachio for me please. Two scoops. With vanilla. In a cone. Merci.
'Tis all for today. I will be waiting with bated breath for the next one. (My inbox is practically itching for it)
Luck!
3Lucas DOxymoronic you say? Well, I'm glad i'm not just the typical 'moron' ;)
Seriously, oxymorons are cool. 'Cold heat', 'dark light' and all that jazz... makes one seem unbelievably witty (stress on the 'unbelievable').
Now, on with the rant about the chapter.
I've noticed that you did reread it. Excellent! No one knows better than the author himself.
I usually don't do this, I just go with the flow, but I must request that you don't make Corin go after Jayden. He may not be Seaton's competition, but he sure seems like a nice guy, and making him go for Jayden will be somewhat of a cliche, especially since we know/guess what will happen next (Jayden thinks he's nice but still likes Seaton a lot, gets into some kind of compromising position with Corin, likes Corin but not as much as he likes Seaton, gets depressed about starting to have human feelings and so on). Make Seaton go for charlie or something. The evil ones should be happy too. Or better yet, have Corin to turn out to be Jay's best bud or something. They'll go sailing on expensive boats or whatever. Then you can kill him off, Corin that is. And make Jay all angsty...
... Alright, I will stop here. My mind wandered to another dimension and I lost control of my fingers. i think I got my point across, but maybe you could surprise me and make that one-sided Jay/Corin into something more that the cliche it threatens to become.
And police! Finally, i thought no law will ever be introduced into this story. It's just that with every chapter the story seems to get more deranged and illegal, and I was anxious to see some good ol' american cops come out to play.
And that moment when Alfred exclaimed 'Cash only' made me ponder something. I know he's saying that because he really needs the cash, not because he really cares for his son all that much, but I wonder if he knows about what Charlie's been up to? I mean, it is kind of hard to NOT notice your son and another male get into a room, moan for a few hours then come out looking rather disheveled. In case you mentioned it somewhere and I just don't remember - my apologies.
About Charlie again, I realise he manipulates the kid, but he does it oh so greatly, and Jayden seemed to comply every time, that I can't help but wonder what happened? I mean, why did he stop? Did he leave and gave Jayden a break, or did the kid stood up for himself (I doubt the latter though). Again, if you already explained that earlier and I just wasn't paying attention - perdono!
Oh, and I wonder what Alfred does to get all those women. There must be something (positively) special about him. Three nipples? five testicles? you're the author...
And of course, do not answer any of those. I'd like to find out as the story progresses.
And I haven't really accepted the lesbians... Alright, maybe i have in some twisted way, but that doesn't mean you have to torture me with their lightness every time. I like angst just as much. And if it's ice-cream this time, pistachio for me please. Two scoops. With vanilla. In a cone. Merci.
'Tis all for today. I will be waiting with bated breath for the next one. (My inbox is practically itching for it)
Luck!