for Dark Indulgence11/24/2013 c6 campbell
a very good short story although it would make a nice novel there are plenty opportunities to make the story longer to add a little bit of drama and maybe some conflict between the main characters...
example: say male is not sure what to do so he draws out his answer and puts female in to a state of despair so it goes to hurt the males apologetic though he is unwilling to admit his emotions to female so this deepens the rift between the 2 child comes along and tries to get the 2 together their are complications that need to be worked through but love rules the 2 separate dimensions.
I do love a happy ending but conflict is a necessity in any good book it captures the readers attention.
a very good short story although it would make a nice novel there are plenty opportunities to make the story longer to add a little bit of drama and maybe some conflict between the main characters...
example: say male is not sure what to do so he draws out his answer and puts female in to a state of despair so it goes to hurt the males apologetic though he is unwilling to admit his emotions to female so this deepens the rift between the 2 child comes along and tries to get the 2 together their are complications that need to be worked through but love rules the 2 separate dimensions.
I do love a happy ending but conflict is a necessity in any good book it captures the readers attention.
11/23/2013 c6 
2bubublacz
Awww! I love this :D Was preparing myself for a major breakdown after reading Dream Catcher that I hesitated with this story :D I thought they'd not end up with each other but I'm happy :D Yeay!
2bubublaczAwww! I love this :D Was preparing myself for a major breakdown after reading Dream Catcher that I hesitated with this story :D I thought they'd not end up with each other but I'm happy :D Yeay!
10/26/2012 c6 INDADD
I like this one the most so far. Maybe because it has a happy ending? :P however, I can't help but think about what would he, Roushik, do after she passes away. Move on? Either to another woman (or women) or would he follow her to death? Do incubus even pass away? Yeah, thoughts.
I like this one the most so far. Maybe because it has a happy ending? :P however, I can't help but think about what would he, Roushik, do after she passes away. Move on? Either to another woman (or women) or would he follow her to death? Do incubus even pass away? Yeah, thoughts.
2/4/2012 c3 Rosie
um... wow...
um... wow...
1/10/2012 c6 girlmundy
Oh this was SOOOO good! I'm so glad it wasn't a one shot...it really developed into something beautiful. I can't wait to read your other stories.
Oh this was SOOOO good! I'm so glad it wasn't a one shot...it really developed into something beautiful. I can't wait to read your other stories.
11/10/2011 c6 1DofD
I absolutely love it. All of it.
(If you want to do another short smutty amewsomeness, I would really like to see what you can do with the younger sister/brothers best friend cliche ;-D).
1DofDI absolutely love it. All of it.
(If you want to do another short smutty amewsomeness, I would really like to see what you can do with the younger sister/brothers best friend cliche ;-D).
7/17/2011 c6 witeaya
who doesnt like smut every now and then? ;)
the story was different, definitely. a good different.
who doesnt like smut every now and then? ;)
the story was different, definitely. a good different.
5/24/2011 c3 Tatiana
She's supposed to be portrayed as a "good girl", but she's very much a slut. She drank, which is not something I at all have respect for. She refused one man's advances, but drunkenly kissed another before she decided she had a romantic interest in him, and when she DID decide she had a romantic interest in him, she immediately requested that he kiss her and feel her up. She is your typical high school "good girl" with daddy issues, and I have no respect for her.
- Tatiana, the extremely critical story critic
She's supposed to be portrayed as a "good girl", but she's very much a slut. She drank, which is not something I at all have respect for. She refused one man's advances, but drunkenly kissed another before she decided she had a romantic interest in him, and when she DID decide she had a romantic interest in him, she immediately requested that he kiss her and feel her up. She is your typical high school "good girl" with daddy issues, and I have no respect for her.
- Tatiana, the extremely critical story critic