for The Black Rose11/24/2007 c1 
18luneress
wow! this sounds really good. sorry to hear u took it down. can't wait to read it!
18luneresswow! this sounds really good. sorry to hear u took it down. can't wait to read it!
9/7/2007 c1 steel cut oats
I hope your fixing. Because this sucked.
Really bad. Also, noticed how the evil lady's daughter watches? Tell us, we really need to be told rather than visualize an elf (cliche upon cliche!) getting slain.
Protip: Show, not tell! It makes cliches look less like crap. Distraction, mostly.
I hope your fixing. Because this sucked.
Really bad. Also, noticed how the evil lady's daughter watches? Tell us, we really need to be told rather than visualize an elf (cliche upon cliche!) getting slain.
Protip: Show, not tell! It makes cliches look less like crap. Distraction, mostly.
8/13/2007 c27 nolongeraround
Ooh! I like the way this story is going so far! I would write a longer review but I have other things to do.
Ooh! I like the way this story is going so far! I would write a longer review but I have other things to do.
8/13/2007 c26 nolongeraround
Okay, so I found out who he was in this chapter! Alright! Tinker has a harsh tongue, a little more than before.
Okay, so I found out who he was in this chapter! Alright! Tinker has a harsh tongue, a little more than before.
8/13/2007 c25 nolongeraround
Heh, he has an antenna? That's funny. White? I guess I'll see in the next couple of chapters.
Heh, he has an antenna? That's funny. White? I guess I'll see in the next couple of chapters.
7/15/2007 c24 nolongeraround
That would hurt, to suddenly grow like that. Now that Tinker is big, it should be interesting. Good chapter.
That would hurt, to suddenly grow like that. Now that Tinker is big, it should be interesting. Good chapter.
7/12/2007 c19 nolongeraround
I don't know why but I laughed at this: “But then what does it mean for me to rise from my ashes? Do I die?”
I don't know why but I laughed at this: “But then what does it mean for me to rise from my ashes? Do I die?”
7/12/2007 c18 nolongeraround
I hate it when people finish each other's sentences. It creeps me out. Good chapter.
I hate it when people finish each other's sentences. It creeps me out. Good chapter.
7/10/2007 c15 4Ember Swish
Great chpter! goodness, Alhmah is gumpy! Haha, can't wait till the next chapter. Still a few spacing problems, but not half as much as before.
4Ember SwishGreat chpter! goodness, Alhmah is gumpy! Haha, can't wait till the next chapter. Still a few spacing problems, but not half as much as before.