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6/20/2008 c1 Misplays Early
wow. i really like the idea of it. i must say that when i started reading, i thought it was cleche, but by the end...it isnt, to say the least. well written.
9/20/2007 c1 half-sketched.staccatos
konban wa

Wow. Powerful. Amazing. I loved that last line: "It was completely true." The one problem I had with this was the capital "H" in some of the "he" and "him"s. It makes it sound like you're talking about God or something. I know you were trying to emphasize the fear in the narrator's voice, but I think it could be just as easily portrayed with bolded letters or italicized.

Gute nacht

-Shan-
8/5/2007 c1 72angel953
um im scared. good job

call me!

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