for All about freedom2/28/2011 c1 mdl97
I like this alot :) Could you check out my stories? I could use the reviews and I would value your oppinion :)
I like this alot :) Could you check out my stories? I could use the reviews and I would value your oppinion :)
2/21/2011 c1 
1StoryMonster
The only things I didn't like about this - grammar and punctuation. Use one punctuation mark and fix your grammar! They're pretty important.
But the whole concept was captured very well, and I admire that.
Keep writing!
~StoryMonster
1StoryMonsterThe only things I didn't like about this - grammar and punctuation. Use one punctuation mark and fix your grammar! They're pretty important.
But the whole concept was captured very well, and I admire that.
Keep writing!
~StoryMonster
12/26/2010 c1 Cecilia A
I like the message, but the grammar is really bad. It makes it hard to understand. Other than this it's good.
-Cecilie
I like the message, but the grammar is really bad. It makes it hard to understand. Other than this it's good.
-Cecilie
12/17/2010 c1 39Raaawr Ima Dinosaur
This is true in so many ways.
amazing poem, you are yet to disappoint me.
Great job :)
39Raaawr Ima DinosaurThis is true in so many ways.
amazing poem, you are yet to disappoint me.
Great job :)
8/3/2007 c1 Kindre Turnany
Use. One. Punctuation. Mark. Seriously. Are you twelve? I just checked your profile and, no. You're actually older than me. Write like it. Never use multiple question marks. And not every sentence ends in an ellipsis. It's fine every once in a while, but this is too much.
"The world I have seen there was no freedom in this world…." That doesn't make sense. and say world once, please?
Um. Check for typos and errors. Check a lot. They're everywhere.
And your grammar's horrible. I guess all I can say is: read an English textbook. It's all backwards and weird. Are you used to a foreign language with dramatically different sentence structure than English? That's what it sounds like...
I think I might have liked this if not for all that...
Use. One. Punctuation. Mark. Seriously. Are you twelve? I just checked your profile and, no. You're actually older than me. Write like it. Never use multiple question marks. And not every sentence ends in an ellipsis. It's fine every once in a while, but this is too much.
"The world I have seen there was no freedom in this world…." That doesn't make sense. and say world once, please?
Um. Check for typos and errors. Check a lot. They're everywhere.
And your grammar's horrible. I guess all I can say is: read an English textbook. It's all backwards and weird. Are you used to a foreign language with dramatically different sentence structure than English? That's what it sounds like...
I think I might have liked this if not for all that...