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for One Over The Other

9/6/2015 c30 MisStruck
Great story, Jack went too far and she moved on. I love Yates (I still love Jack, but I shouldn't) and I'm glad they get together.
4/2/2013 c30 jennielove
i absolutely loved it. it was amazing! i thot jack was nice bt he turned outbto b an ass but i love yate. please write a sequel.
11/7/2012 c13 witeaya
its not worth all the pain to be with someone who will hurt u all their might when they thought u were doing something that dont sit well with them.
i cannot see jack's positive all. there were all wiped out with all his vindictiveness.
4/13/2012 c30 5poopforbrains
Author, you will now receive a very lengthy review from me.

Your work, I just - no words can express how much I love it. There were so many unexpected twists and turns that my mind and heart were racing with excitement the longer I read your story. This has probably been THE BEST story I have ever read. And I'm not just saying that either.

I absolutely loved how you didn't make it the cliche story of her first love being the last. This story just goes to show that while first loves are hard to forget, they're not always the last. Which is your tad touch of reality in the story.

At first, I was all for Jack. He was, after all, the first guy to show up. But then he began hurting her like crazy. Usually, I'm all up for the usual cliches of revenge but eventually the first guy and main girl would get together. This story, however, was an exception.

I'll be honest here. Since obviously there were going to be triangles - what, from your summary - after reading the first chapter, I immediately skipped to the last and to be honest, I was disappointed at first to see that Elliot didn't end up with Jack. But then for some reason, I decided to check the reviews and saw that many of your previous readers had enjoyed how the story turned out.

So, I gave it a chance.

And boy was I ever glad that I did. This story never bored me or even made me think of stopping to read this since I decided to finish it. Your characters have really developed themselves and made me fall in love with them so much.

Elliot - For being so strong as a person. And though I don't particularly agree with a lot of her choices, I still happened to enjoy everything that was happening. She's so innocent and quite frankly, naive. But this just added more to her as a character and help us readers to be drawn to her.

Yates - Oh, god. Where do I begin? He is so rough with his bad boy, kick ass, rule breaking persona yet so incredibly sweet to the people (or rather, person) he truly cares about. He's everyone's dream boyfriend; naughty yet charming.

Jack - Honestly, in a lot of parts, I wanted to strangle him. Ha, I probably sound crazy. What, with wanting to strangle a fictional character. However, he WAS an ass. So, I think he deserved the hate. He's your typical charmer but with a secretly vindictive and conniving side.

I wanted to put about Brooke and Mitch, as well but they really didn't have that much parts in the story. Okay, wait. They did but as a general, they didn't portray much. So, I'll just skip them.

It was such an amazing experience to read your story because it really made me feel that high school drama experience again. Though none of these things happened to me, it still had amazing quality as a plot.

It's quite sad how you don't plan to pursue your initial plan to make a sequel but it's okay. I understand. I just hope that you continue writing. Your story is really good and it would be amazing to read some more. (:

For me, the only thing that you need to improve is your grammar and punctuation. There are some parts where you have some errors but it can be overlooked. However, it would be really nice if you fixed it up, as well. (:

All in all, reading this has been an amazing experience and I thank you for putting up this wonderful piece of art here. (:

Great job!

-poopforbrains
12/5/2010 c30 1Quiet Chaos
This was amazing. I am in shock at how amazing it was. My brain is now mush. MUSH. Throughout the whole thing, I wanted to marry Yates. I found it a bit redundant how blind he was about Elliot liking him (and vice versa). In the beginning, I was a bit confused because I had no idea how Elliot ended up at Brooke and Jack's house, and I had no idea where her parents were. Apparently, she was an orphan, but it never explained that at all. I think it would have been better if that was talked about in a little more depth.

I love this story for so many reasons. I found it really origional that Elliot didn't end up with Jack, she got over him and found Yates. I loved that 'cause its really realistic-we don't always end up with our first loves. I really loved Mitch. He was awesome. I'm so glad he got a happy ending. You are such an amazing writer. I can't wait to check out the sequel. :)
11/2/2010 c30 mahi
Wow...I loved this story...It was amazing.Yates is so sweet and Jack was a total jerk. If she had gone back to him,after all he has done, I'd have totally hated this story..Keep writing!
10/10/2010 c30 witeaya
i love how u uncliched' the cliche'.
10/10/2010 c7 witeaya
so far i find the story interesting.

but 1 thing i noticed is that elliot and brooke dont seem like best friends. they rarely talk and even tho 1 of them looked sad they dont talk it out. elliot didnt even ask about leo.

it's just confusing. are they really close?
9/4/2009 c30 Strangely Natural
This is a great story, it’s like reading her journal or something, hearing her communicate and analyze things, coping with the mixed messages and flaky people around her, having her not worry about trying to be different or fit in, but just be happy and moving on and being rational is very refreshing, a great example of this is the end of chapter 20.

Her relationship with Yates is nice too, very well crafted indeed, even though she keeps hurting him with her indecisive denseness, and he doesn’t help due to his fear of rejection and abandonment. Oh well. It’s sad you know, their first time being intimate should have been full of love and freedom, and instead there were secrets and broken hidden hearts, may it’s better that way, they can let go easier that way…even though they’re meant to be together. Chapter 24 was brutal, so much misunderstanding and pain, what a way to ruin a good thing.

This book is a lot more emotional than I thought it would be, it’s a pleasant surprise. The guys all carrying weapons is a terrifying thing though. On the other hand ch 25 was freakin’ awesome! Jack finally letting go, things getting serious, pretty climatic in a way or should I say the calm before the storm, I did appreciate however, that Jack didn’t get Yates expelled, it would have been way to unfair to do that.

*“You were blind, for too long, you missed your chance. He’s getting over you, granted he’ll kiss you and screw you but as we’ve learnt over the years, that’s his pastime. Sex means nothing to him, you’ll be a friend, always, but the relationship will never travel further than that because you’ve entered into a zone that means nothing. He’ll never look beyond the friendship lines you’ve drawn. I hate to be the one to tell you since it seems you genuinely like him, he’s gone, moved on. All you have with him now is sex and a friendship.” I felt like I had been kicked in the gut. I don’t just want sex and a friendship with Yates, not anymore. A sickly feeling overwhelmed me and the food I just had seemed to want to make its way back up.* That was the worst part of all. Losing him...it’s just too much.

Yates love confession, finally sealing the deal between him and Elliot, was just utterly wonderful and I’m glad he told her first, that he got over his fear of rejection and abandonment, and now she’s not dense or indecisive anymore, how wonderful, the misunderstandings have cleared up! Chapter 28, especially the ending, was the best scene ever! The love the truth and symbolism, GREAT stuff!

*This was the key to his heart. What did that mean exactly? “It means I’m yours. I love you, no one else.” Apparently I had said my thoughts aloud. “You're the only girl to ever make me feel this way. Therefore you’re the only girl to be given that key.” “What, do you keep it lying around, for moments like this?” I teased; he rolled his eyes and moved slightly closer to me. “No I don’t keep it lying around. I...I’ve carried that around with me for three days, just waiting to give it to you. Remember when I wanted to confess something to you?” I nodded. It was by the tree yesterday. “Well I started but you cut me off. I was desperate to tell you; anytime I got close you quickly stopped me from speaking. Frankly I felt like just shouting it at you but then that didn’t seem very appropriate for something like this.” He exhaled loudly then started playing nervously with the end of his shirt that hung loosely over his pants. “I technically told you yesterday when we were about to fool around. I meant it I swear to god I meant it. When you started saying how it was over I panicked. I thought that I had scared you because of what I said. Therefore I took it back, I told you I never meant it hoping that if I did you would stay, you would let me kiss you, let me hold you, let me continue to love you. I took a big risk by coming here because I still wasn’t sure whether or not that’s what scared you off in the first place. I’m not even sure if it was worth it to come here and confess.” That hurt slightly. “How so?” “You haven’t said anything. It’s like you’ve brushed it under the rug and are going to deal with it later. I love you, does that not warrant some kind of response?” He waited for a reply. “Yates I...it’s not like that...I...” Okay, why can’t I answer him straight? “You don’t feel the same way do you?”He asked slightly worried. I opened my mouth to speak, still stuttering slightly and unsure what to say. “Yates please...it’s just...”His face dropped, he knew I didn’t feel the same way. “It’s okay Elliot if you don’t feel the same way, we are friends after all.” He said rather harshly. God I was hurting him and this is exactly not how this should be happening. I am falling in love with him; I’m just not in love with him, yet. “I’m falling...”I said after a few seconds of silence, he perked up a bit and gave me the classic smile that made my knees melt, good thing I’m sitting down. “I’ll catch you when you land.” He smiled as I rolled my eyes. How did I find such a great guy? I honestly have no idea what he sees in me.* I was wrong this is the best scene so far, and honestly I hope she wises us soon, and tells him she loves him and never wants to let go. It’s the only way, I mean come on, after everything, she must or all is lost. He’s so sweet and so far gone for her, it’s marvelous, as is chapter 28, just wonderful and sweet!

*Our relationship has been met with open arms from his friends. Will and Ainslie cheered in the hallway saying that their matchmaking skills were genius. I do kinda have to thank them for their input because no doubt we wouldn’t have been together without their help and mind games, making Yates jealous. That reminds me, I probably should thank his sister Ana, apparently she gave Yates an earful about how his relationship was with me. * meddling for once it a welcome and wonderful help lol. His triplet sisters are awesome, and Abby’s nuts but cool. The date and the before and after of the date, ch 29 were just awesome! Sweet and tender comic relief and realism, great work.

Yates is a keeper absolutely, I really hope they work out, can’t wait to see what happens to them ch 30 was a real tearjerker: *“Say it.” He whispered. I shook my head and looked into his eyes. “Say it Elliot and none of this has to happen.” I shook my head again; he kissed my forehead and kept me in his embrace. “I love you.” I whispered against his chest. “I love you too.” Then he kissed me...“Say it.” My eyes were shut but I could feel his intense gaze on me. “I can’t.” He kissed me gently again then pulled out of the embrace to say goodbye to his friends. I stood there watching him, terrified of the future… “I miss you too, now have a good flight.” “I’ll try...say it and I’ll come back.” “You know I can’t...I love you, speak to you later.” “I love you too.” He hung up and I looked down at the flashing phone. “Stay.” I whispered, more to myself than anyone else.* see what I mean, those were spectacular scenes, full of tense emotion and wonder.

*“I’ll call you in three hours when I land, I’ll email you in five hours when I’m bored, I’ll call you in six when I miss your voice, I’ll email you in seven when I’m bored again and I’ll call you in eight to hear your voice before I go to sleep.”* I quoted this just because I love it and know everybody wants hear those things at some point and because Yates is amazing.

What a great and well-written story, keeps you coming back for more, the ending was simply perfect, I have never said that before, I would change nothing about the final chapters or their relationship especially his CD and puppy gift and his marriage proposal to top it all off. This is a good book and I would gladly read it again sometime. I can’t wait for the sequel, everybody (the great friends, Jack, even Yates sisters and the puppy) deserves to have their say in it, and we get to see Yates and Elliot again and that just brightens anyone’s day. Good luck with everything and pleasant writing.
8/7/2009 c30 2Popcornluver
oh my gosh I loved this story I don't care that it didn't end exactly how I would have liked but I still loved it and I love yates tears they better stay together
7/27/2009 c30 MarieAnn
Hi. I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed reading your story. The characters were developed really well and I liked them. Please write a sequel to this! I want to know how Elliot and Yates's relationship progressed, what happened with Jack, and how the other characters ended up as well. Best of luck!
5/7/2009 c30 3DarkGoddess3
I really loved your story. I'm glad she didn't get back with Jack you just can't get past that kind of pain it never would of worked out. I love Yates he is so perfect even with his inperfections.(if that makes scence?) I would like to read Dalton and Ainslie's story with info in it on how Yates and Elliot are doing. Anyway really great story.
1/27/2009 c1 1SiobhanO
this is so awesome! i can;t wait to read the rest
1/27/2009 c30 3RayaSlayer
Oh god...that was so romantic!

I never would've expected Elliot to end up with Yates when he first entered the story, but it sorta just clicked.

They really are such a sweet, funny and perfect couple :)

Thank you for such a good story :D
1/23/2009 c30 AJ southern
Very nice story... a little rough in the beginning, but through this story I can see how you developed as a writer. You seemed to have found your style about midway through and this turned out to be a very interesting and well written story. : )
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