for Inside My Head1/8/2008 c2 
1The Five
Woah. There was some really deep stuff in there. But the repeated use of your 'name' kinda makes it sounds like you are talking to another person rather than thinking. Anyways, other than that, I really enjoyed this. And I don't think you were a dickhead in chapter 1. Just wondering, though, don't you feel uncomfortable sharing all your private emotions and opinions with total strangers?
1The FiveWoah. There was some really deep stuff in there. But the repeated use of your 'name' kinda makes it sounds like you are talking to another person rather than thinking. Anyways, other than that, I really enjoyed this. And I don't think you were a dickhead in chapter 1. Just wondering, though, don't you feel uncomfortable sharing all your private emotions and opinions with total strangers?
12/23/2007 c2 6SilverTwilight
Hmm...Well this one was obviously written when you were in an emotional time, which isn't a bad thing. However, for what you're going for, a detached reflectiveness, it doesn't flow well. I like the idea, maybe it could use some re-working, though. A Friday, perhaps.
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Dx
6SilverTwilightHmm...Well this one was obviously written when you were in an emotional time, which isn't a bad thing. However, for what you're going for, a detached reflectiveness, it doesn't flow well. I like the idea, maybe it could use some re-working, though. A Friday, perhaps.
~
Dx
12/17/2007 c1 SilverTwilight
“OMG you bastard no wonder you don’t have friendz! You’re always studing them omggmo!” Just kidding. This is written really funny, because you're talking to yourself and it reminds me of Sesame Street. But otherwise effective.
I've never really understood friends, myself. Not just friends, though, people in general. And I can't see how people with deep emotional connections with one person, like a best friend, can have such and know, for a fact, that their best friend is who their best friend really is. It might be easy for people to resign to having a friend, but it's the ones that think "why am I supposed to like you, again?" that have true free thinking. Well, I'm glad this got me thinking, because it's good to be evaluating these things every so now and then, so you don't get lost in the mob.
One critique: it looks like you wrote this quickly, because there are a couple spelling/grammar mistakes that look more like type-os. I would suggest reading over it a couple times, even though it would make you re-think posting it (For it's silliness. People are always harsher on themselves.).
~
Dx
“OMG you bastard no wonder you don’t have friendz! You’re always studing them omggmo!” Just kidding. This is written really funny, because you're talking to yourself and it reminds me of Sesame Street. But otherwise effective.
I've never really understood friends, myself. Not just friends, though, people in general. And I can't see how people with deep emotional connections with one person, like a best friend, can have such and know, for a fact, that their best friend is who their best friend really is. It might be easy for people to resign to having a friend, but it's the ones that think "why am I supposed to like you, again?" that have true free thinking. Well, I'm glad this got me thinking, because it's good to be evaluating these things every so now and then, so you don't get lost in the mob.
One critique: it looks like you wrote this quickly, because there are a couple spelling/grammar mistakes that look more like type-os. I would suggest reading over it a couple times, even though it would make you re-think posting it (For it's silliness. People are always harsher on themselves.).
~
Dx