for Chronicles of Avairean: Dragonblade7/1/2009 c24 
13Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Well, guess it's a case of lack of guard from Baxorth here. I'm more and more along the line that he may not be that high up in the power tier within the story. It will be interesting though to see whether I'm wrong here. Due to my biased love for wolves or anything canine, I truly hope to see him along the line of Rachel Alucard of the BlazBlue game. ;)
As for Amira, well I'm pretty glad to see what you've done with her. It's not that often that a sheltered character can be a vital one within the plot. You don't have to think too much on that given that I don't really find anything wrong.
With that being said though, Kelch's statement on his crime seems a bit obscure to me. Yeah I got the idea, but it's because of what Amira said, not him. But then again, it maybe because that I missed out something in the story. After all, it's been N ages since I've started on this one. :S With that being said though, if you've made that clear in the previous chapters, maybe you can tell me the answer. If it's still unrevealed, then it's fine by me.
And the first part of this chapter seems to go along the line of somebody putting pen to paper on Kelch's life here. Am I right on this one?
13Tsumujikaze no SoujutsuWell, guess it's a case of lack of guard from Baxorth here. I'm more and more along the line that he may not be that high up in the power tier within the story. It will be interesting though to see whether I'm wrong here. Due to my biased love for wolves or anything canine, I truly hope to see him along the line of Rachel Alucard of the BlazBlue game. ;)
As for Amira, well I'm pretty glad to see what you've done with her. It's not that often that a sheltered character can be a vital one within the plot. You don't have to think too much on that given that I don't really find anything wrong.
With that being said though, Kelch's statement on his crime seems a bit obscure to me. Yeah I got the idea, but it's because of what Amira said, not him. But then again, it maybe because that I missed out something in the story. After all, it's been N ages since I've started on this one. :S With that being said though, if you've made that clear in the previous chapters, maybe you can tell me the answer. If it's still unrevealed, then it's fine by me.
And the first part of this chapter seems to go along the line of somebody putting pen to paper on Kelch's life here. Am I right on this one?
6/30/2009 c24 3Gummi-Arms
Certainly a reckless move by Baxorth. I suppose Kelch will have some company. If he were more of a roguish character, he would probably claim it was all part of his plan to cover up the slip-up, but I guess Baxorth isn't really like that. The princess was a little surprising, since she seemed like a more minor character, but I guess we'll see. She's a little hard to read right now, since she's an unfamiliar character.
3Gummi-ArmsCertainly a reckless move by Baxorth. I suppose Kelch will have some company. If he were more of a roguish character, he would probably claim it was all part of his plan to cover up the slip-up, but I guess Baxorth isn't really like that. The princess was a little surprising, since she seemed like a more minor character, but I guess we'll see. She's a little hard to read right now, since she's an unfamiliar character.
5/24/2009 c23 13Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Well i'm getting a bit sleepy now, so not too sure on what I will say here. Anyway, first things first glad to see you back here again. :) Hopefully it's for good. ;) Well, it actually seems that things are picking up now with the events here triggering the greater picture. I like the part on the vision for Sheik. Seems rather real to me. As for Baxorth, I really don't know what he will do next. To be frank he seems like a wild card character to me, which is why I'll be interested to know more about him as a character. :) Well guess Kelch won't die on me here since he should be the main character here. Which led me to wonder how will he retrieve the Seeker. Anyway all in all a good chapter here. And yeah, thanks very much for your reviews on Atheran. tbh it's pretty unexpected since you've gone MIA here for quite a long time.
13Tsumujikaze no SoujutsuWell i'm getting a bit sleepy now, so not too sure on what I will say here. Anyway, first things first glad to see you back here again. :) Hopefully it's for good. ;) Well, it actually seems that things are picking up now with the events here triggering the greater picture. I like the part on the vision for Sheik. Seems rather real to me. As for Baxorth, I really don't know what he will do next. To be frank he seems like a wild card character to me, which is why I'll be interested to know more about him as a character. :) Well guess Kelch won't die on me here since he should be the main character here. Which led me to wonder how will he retrieve the Seeker. Anyway all in all a good chapter here. And yeah, thanks very much for your reviews on Atheran. tbh it's pretty unexpected since you've gone MIA here for quite a long time.
5/23/2009 c23 3Gummi-Arms
Interesting. I might have to look over the earlier chapters again since its been a while, but this Kiar has sparked my interest. And once again, Sheik proves to be an interesting character by disconcerting Baxorth so easily.
I wonder, is Baxorth going to kill the king, or is he up to something else. This looks like it could intense.
3Gummi-ArmsInteresting. I might have to look over the earlier chapters again since its been a while, but this Kiar has sparked my interest. And once again, Sheik proves to be an interesting character by disconcerting Baxorth so easily.
I wonder, is Baxorth going to kill the king, or is he up to something else. This looks like it could intense.
5/3/2009 c3 1Mikado-Maid
this is getting quite good. I'm interested in "one-names" and the connection with the black dragon and the strange medallion.
On to the next chapter...
1Mikado-Maidthis is getting quite good. I'm interested in "one-names" and the connection with the black dragon and the strange medallion.
On to the next chapter...
5/3/2009 c2 Mikado-Maid
Well, well, well. I'm interested. Just wanted you to know that I read the first part, and I must say the feather part got to me. I wanna know more.
So, off to read more.
Mum
Well, well, well. I'm interested. Just wanted you to know that I read the first part, and I must say the feather part got to me. I wanna know more.
So, off to read more.
Mum
12/20/2008 c22 2Casey Drake
-rubs hands- FINALLY I can catch up on all the CoA I've been missing... heeheehee this is going to be FUN
:D CD
2Casey Drake-rubs hands- FINALLY I can catch up on all the CoA I've been missing... heeheehee this is going to be FUN
:D CD
12/20/2008 c22 3Gummi-Arms
Sounds like its going to be a fun party. And this shiek is certainly an interesting guy. I love the banter between him and Baxorth.
3Gummi-ArmsSounds like its going to be a fun party. And this shiek is certainly an interesting guy. I love the banter between him and Baxorth.
10/31/2008 c22 13Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Wow, judging from this chapter, I assume Drask will be a major pwnage once that seal or whatever it's called got removed, huh? But then again, that will also mean his brother is another pwnage as well from what I've guessed. ;) As for Amira, I don't know why, but I just have this odd feeling that there can be chemistry between her and Baxorth. And it really seems that Baxorth is a feared name here, huh? And yeah, I'm still not too sure about the taint in this chapter. Care to explain more to me? I think it has something to do with Sheik's vision. Anyway, I guess it's high time that we will get a rumble up in our hands. Do update will ya? ;)
13Tsumujikaze no SoujutsuWow, judging from this chapter, I assume Drask will be a major pwnage once that seal or whatever it's called got removed, huh? But then again, that will also mean his brother is another pwnage as well from what I've guessed. ;) As for Amira, I don't know why, but I just have this odd feeling that there can be chemistry between her and Baxorth. And it really seems that Baxorth is a feared name here, huh? And yeah, I'm still not too sure about the taint in this chapter. Care to explain more to me? I think it has something to do with Sheik's vision. Anyway, I guess it's high time that we will get a rumble up in our hands. Do update will ya? ;)
10/26/2008 c14 1Erin A. Schauss
About your fight scenes... well, they're certainly not anime, as that tends to entail large scale destruction and phenomenal pain tolerance. I'm not sure what you'd classify as 'typical fantasy', but I will say that I really like the way you write them; the split viewpoints going over the same bit again and again in this chapter reveal a lot of good information. (and funny information... Tsukoken falling off the carriage, heehee) Personally, I'm terrible at fight scenes, so I don't know what else I can say. There are a couple of little grammatical mistakes in your work, but they're few and far between, so you might not want to spend time going back and finding them, unless you want absolute perfection in your work.
1Erin A. SchaussAbout your fight scenes... well, they're certainly not anime, as that tends to entail large scale destruction and phenomenal pain tolerance. I'm not sure what you'd classify as 'typical fantasy', but I will say that I really like the way you write them; the split viewpoints going over the same bit again and again in this chapter reveal a lot of good information. (and funny information... Tsukoken falling off the carriage, heehee) Personally, I'm terrible at fight scenes, so I don't know what else I can say. There are a couple of little grammatical mistakes in your work, but they're few and far between, so you might not want to spend time going back and finding them, unless you want absolute perfection in your work.
10/24/2008 c21 13Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Well, again a good chapter here. I like the way you diversify this whole world of yours. And yeah, for some weird reasons, the Anon reminds me of Arabs lol! :D Anyway, just a word of caution here: I've got no problems with you having multiple characters. Just be careful on how you will distribute the characters' focus. And yeah, I guess maybe you can put two main scenes in your next chapter with Drask and Kelch respectively. In that way, you can satisfy your readers. ^^ Well, I really wonder what will happen next especially with Sheik's reactions on Kelch. Hope to see this updated soon. ^^ Bye! :)
13Tsumujikaze no SoujutsuWell, again a good chapter here. I like the way you diversify this whole world of yours. And yeah, for some weird reasons, the Anon reminds me of Arabs lol! :D Anyway, just a word of caution here: I've got no problems with you having multiple characters. Just be careful on how you will distribute the characters' focus. And yeah, I guess maybe you can put two main scenes in your next chapter with Drask and Kelch respectively. In that way, you can satisfy your readers. ^^ Well, I really wonder what will happen next especially with Sheik's reactions on Kelch. Hope to see this updated soon. ^^ Bye! :)
10/10/2008 c20 Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Herro. Well, first things first, on th part of jay's missing scene, all I can say is that I'll be interested to see what you have planned for it. If it has a tie with the plot or character developments, even better. Or rather you should put it up if that's the case. :) Anyway, I'll be interested to see what is Sethe's past with Ayra. That will be interesting not to mention that it could play into the overall plot and character developments as well. :) I really wonder what will happen to Jay. And yeah, I've still not forgotten Drask lol! XD And yeah, Cain'Anon seems like an interesting character as well. It really seems that you're targetting a huge character roster in this story. And for some reasons, the Spirit Cain'Anon summoned reminds me of Djinn in one of my works Circles of Arven. :) Anyway, nothing to complain here except that hope to see you update with this one. Bye! :)
Herro. Well, first things first, on th part of jay's missing scene, all I can say is that I'll be interested to see what you have planned for it. If it has a tie with the plot or character developments, even better. Or rather you should put it up if that's the case. :) Anyway, I'll be interested to see what is Sethe's past with Ayra. That will be interesting not to mention that it could play into the overall plot and character developments as well. :) I really wonder what will happen to Jay. And yeah, I've still not forgotten Drask lol! XD And yeah, Cain'Anon seems like an interesting character as well. It really seems that you're targetting a huge character roster in this story. And for some reasons, the Spirit Cain'Anon summoned reminds me of Djinn in one of my works Circles of Arven. :) Anyway, nothing to complain here except that hope to see you update with this one. Bye! :)
10/9/2008 c20 3Gummi-Arms
Interesting chapter. I can see what you mean by adding a bit more religious subtext, it does indeed make the world seem richer.
And I can only sympathise with your dillemma of too many characters. I have the same problem sometimes, especially with Seal of Prayers now. Things always have to get so darn complicated. And then you feel like you aren't getting anywhere because the main characters haven't done anything in a few chapters but you really want to get on with it.
But, I digress. I would think the best way to keep these things in check would be to question the relevance of any given part to the plot as a whole. Keep the parts that will eventually impact the main storyline in a significant way, and the rest only add in if you need filler or something. I dunno, does that approach sound good?
Anyways, good luck with the rest.
3Gummi-ArmsInteresting chapter. I can see what you mean by adding a bit more religious subtext, it does indeed make the world seem richer.
And I can only sympathise with your dillemma of too many characters. I have the same problem sometimes, especially with Seal of Prayers now. Things always have to get so darn complicated. And then you feel like you aren't getting anywhere because the main characters haven't done anything in a few chapters but you really want to get on with it.
But, I digress. I would think the best way to keep these things in check would be to question the relevance of any given part to the plot as a whole. Keep the parts that will eventually impact the main storyline in a significant way, and the rest only add in if you need filler or something. I dunno, does that approach sound good?
Anyways, good luck with the rest.
10/3/2008 c2 5jlhc
*wants more* Wow, I really enjoy this. This is perhaps better than Infused Magic...I'll wait to say more farther in, but I like how you plant things for later.
5jlhc*wants more* Wow, I really enjoy this. This is perhaps better than Infused Magic...I'll wait to say more farther in, but I like how you plant things for later.
10/3/2008 c1 jlhc
I figured it would be nice to read your main story...but since I've read all the side things, it is really confusing to me. However, I shall endure and see what this story brings, your pride. Off to begin~
I figured it would be nice to read your main story...but since I've read all the side things, it is really confusing to me. However, I shall endure and see what this story brings, your pride. Off to begin~